Shattered heart(jikook)

Nine

As he laid in bed Jungkooks thoughts were caster back to a few weeks ago when he was playing games with Jimin at a table in his hotel room.

"Hahaha Hyung you're so bad at this game!" Jungkook laughed.

"I just can't do it." Jimin said with a pouty face. 

Jungkook smiled at his Hyung, who was sulking, as he began to realise how cute Jimin really was. Even though jungkook was younger than Jimin, he always felt as if Jimin was so cute and he needed so much attention just like a baby.

However as soon as Jimin turned to find jungkook staring at him with his dough eyes jk quickly averted his gaze back to his screen. Jimin knew he caught jungkook staring and instantly wanted more attention.

"I'm tired." Jimin said with a cute and soft voice as he leaned his head on Jungkooks shoulder.
He hoped jungkook would offer his bed and let him have a nap while jk was still playing on his computer at the table.

Jungkook thought about offering Jimin his bed as he didn't want Jimin to walk so far to his hotel room as he knew it was on the other side of the hotel. however he quickly changed his mind when he realised that it would be really strange to have a guy sleeping in his bed.
In a panic without offering Jimin another look he just said,

"Go back to your room then" with such a lack of emotion in his voice he could've been mistook for a robot.

Jimins smile faded as it wasn't the answer he wanted to hear. He just didn't understand why jungkook always treated him differently. Jimin knew that if it was any of the other members jungkook wouldn't have answered I'm the same way. It really hurt Jimin everyday to know he's in love with someone who will never want him.

Jimin didn't reply to Jungkooks blunt suggestion, he just set down his controller, got up and walked out of the room with his head down. Jungkook saw Jimin and instantly felt awful for speaking so rudely to him.

Jungkook just couldn't understand why Jimin always made him feel a weird feeling and why he feels guilty for things he never used to feel guilt for. It always made jungkook panic.

(Now in Real time)

Jungkook had his head in his pillow and just couldn't stop recalling moments like that.

Why couldn't I realise I liked him back then, it was obvious. I'm so stupid! Did I always treat him like this? He must have had such a hard time everyday because of the way I would treat him. All of the hurt must have slowly built up in his heart and I placed the last straw on that night I said those horrible things. I can totally understand why he doesn't want to be anything but my Hyung.

Jungkook never hated Jimin actually it was quite the opposite. Ever since debut Jimin would cling to jungkook and Jungkook wouldn't mind it if it was at the dorm but when it was in places full of people it irritated jk that everyone would think things in the wrong way. He always loved hanging out with his Jimin Hyung and wanted to spend lots of time with him however jungkook never liked to express these feelings and just out of instinct would push Jimin away every time.

But lately he didn't mind the clinging too much as for some reason he started to enjoy it and sometimes you would even catch jk initiating the affection. But now it was Jimin who was starting to push jungkook away and it made jk realise how much it actually hurt.

Devastated by the conversation he had just had with Jimin on the balcony, jungkook forced himself to sleep as they had one final round of interviews tomorrow and he didn't know how he would face it....