𝐷𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒~ 𝐵.𝐵𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑒𝑠

TWENTY FIVE

"It was him. He looked right at me like he didn't even know me." Steve says glumly as we're sat in the back of the van. "How's that even possible? It was like seventy years ago." I keep my eyes down feeling them sting as I messed with the ring around my neck. "Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43, Zola experimented on him. Whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and..." A tear escapes at Steve's words, I can't imagine what they'd put him through.

"None of that's your fault, Steve." Natasha tries to console him as Sam puts a hand on my knee. It might not have been Steve's fault but it was mine. I'd been alive all this time, I could've found him if I had looked, if I had stayed at shield I could've prevented so much of this."Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky." Sam notices Natasha is bleeding from her shoulder and looks at the guards, "We need to get a doctor here. We don't put pressure on that wound she's gonna bleed out here in the truck." Suddenly one of the guards pulls out an electric rod neutralizes the other guard and knocks him out, the guard is revealed to be Hill as she takes off her helmet.

"Ah. That thing was squeezing my brain." She says as Sam looks at her in confusion; to Steve. "Who's this guy?"

• • •

"GSW. She's lost at least a pint." Maria says I a doctor as she escorts us to a secret facility. "Maybe two." Sam adds, "Let me take her." The doctor says but Maria shakes her head, "She'll want to see him first."

She takes us to Fury who's alive and lying in bed, all of us looking at him in shock, "About damn time." He says.

"Lacerated spinal column, cracked sternum, shattered collarbone, perforated liver, one hell of a headache." Fury lists off his injuries, "Don't forget your collapsed lung." The doctor adds from where he was sat treating Natasha's bullet wound. "Oh, let's not forget that. Otherwise, I'm good."

"They cut you open, your heart stopped." Natasha says not understanding, "Tetrodotoxin B. Slows the pulse to one beat a minute. Banner developed it for stress. Didn't work so great for him, but we found a use for it." Smart, "Why all the secrecy? Why not just tell us?" Steve asks, "Any attempt on the director's life had to look successful." That made sense, "Can't kill you if you're already dead. Besides, I wasn't sure who to trust." He says, "I'm offended, I thought we had established a sense of trust back in 95 Nick." I hum shaking my head in mock disappointment as he glares at me, he claimed he hated when I'd call him nick but I'd do it anyway cause I think he secretly didn't mind.

• • •

"This man declined the Nobel Peace Prize. He said, 'Peace wasn't an achievement, it was a responsibility.' See, it's stuff like this that gives me trust issues." Nick says as he looks at a picture of pierce I shake my head at him, "everything gives you trust issues."

"We have to stop the launch." Natasha says, "I don't think the Council's accepting my calls anymore." Fury opens a case containing three chips, "What's that?" Sam asks, "Once the Helicarriers reach three thousand feet, they'll triangulate with Insight satellites becoming fully weaponized." Hill explains, "We need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own."

"One or two won't cut it. We need to link all three carriers for this to work, because if even one of those ships remains operational a whole lot of people are gonna die." I sigh at what Hill tells us. "We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers is HYDRA. We need to get pass them, insert the server blades, and maybe, just maybe, we can salvage what's left..." Steve cuts Fury off, "We're not salvaging anything. We're not just taking down the carriers, Nick, we're taking down SHIELD." He says firmly. "SHIELD had nothing to do with it." Fury defends, "You gave me this mission, this is how it ends. SHIELD's been compromised, you said so yourself. HYDRA grew right under your nose and nobody noticed."

"Why do you think we're meeting in this cave? I noticed." Well he took his time noticing, "And how many paid the price before you did?" Steve asks, "Look, I didn't know about Barnes." My fingers find the ring, I press the cool metal into my palm as I close my eyes. "Even if you have, would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too? SHIELD, HYDRA, it all goes."

"He's right." Hill says as I open my eye, Fury looks at Natasha then Sam, "Don't look at me. I do what he does, just slower." Then he turns to me, I squeeze the ring for a second before I drop it and nod. "Well... Looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain."

I get up and leave the room, I couldn't handle it, my thoughts were suffocating me, everything was suffocating me. I sit in the hallway my back against the wall, my knees curled into my chest. I rest my head on my knees and screw my eyes shut as I try and keep the feelings in, I couldn't let them out not after seventy years, all that pent up sadness and anger I'd explode.

"Rosie? Oh man." I hear Steve mumble as he finds me, I look up to see what he was looking at, I'd created a layer of ice all around me, it was creeping up the walls towards the ceiling and all over the floor. I hadn't even realised that I had done it, "Sorry." I murmur making it all evaporate.

Steve sits on the ground opposite me and doesn't say anything for a moment. "Rosie?" I look at him, "are you ok?" I nod, "I- I'm fine." I say leaning my head back, he looks at me unconvinced, "the ice creeping up the ceiling would say otherwise." He says making me smile, "it's all my fault." I tell him making his brows furrow as he moves closer.

"Rosie what are you talking about? This isn't your fault." I shake my head, "it is, I'm a coward Steve, I abandoned our friends because I was scared that they were ageing and I wasn't, I should've stayed, I could've found him, I-"

"You couldn't have known." He tries to assure me, "I might've if I didn't run." I say, "Rosalie, he wouldn't blame you and he wouldn't want you to blame yourself." He tells me reminding me of the similar conversation we'd had when we thought Bucky died only it was Steve who was blaming himself then.

"We're going soon, you don't have to come." Steve says after a moment. "No, I'm coming." I tell him adamantly, not only did I actually want to help, but maybe there was a chance of getting Bucky back, I had to see him, even if it would be for the last time.