The Words Of The Moon (S1)

4. Leaving Home

I wanted to leave home ... and I left ...

I didn't want to regard myself like a stupid person to satisfy another person

I wasn't ok and My mental discomfort, didn't help me alot

I saw my death with my eyes
At this time , I heared a motto that said :

" No one is worth it "

I don't know why I was attracted to it?
Was it because of logic of it, or because of my own circumstances ...?!

" No one is worth getting upset about ...

No one is worth staying awake in the night about ...

No one is worth not eating food about ...

No one is worth crying about ...

No one is worth your tears about ...

No one is worth your love about ...

And when you are alone, it doesn't means that you are bullshit !
It means no one deserves you "

All of these were nearing me when I was upset ... but, do you know what?!

It say true ...

Now when I don't dedicate myself to anyone, I am hapy and free ...

I leaved my father's home for a real life and finally I found it

I living for myself, but behaving as before just cause that I conecting to my past ...

I'm sorry ... but that's it ... I can't do anything ...

At these times, I only thought about the mistakes that you put them on my head ... Don't expact that I open my arms for you ...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I try to be healthy ... try to know ... to study everyrhing ... to stay in high level ... to run ... to laugh ... to show myself as a best in all of things but everything is shattering me and it's my mistake ...

Everytime When I read this sentence, I remember a poem that say :

I am tired of this place, I hope people change

I need time to replace what I gave away

And my hopes, they are high, I must keep them small

Though I try to resist I still want it all

I see swimming pools and living rooms and aeroplanes

I see a little house on the hill and children's names

I see quiet nights poured over ice and Tanqueray

But everything is shattering and it's my mistake ~

I try to be alive ... the thing maybe that is easy for another one

But I only stay in intermediate; because the people who protect me and advice me ... they saved my body and killed my soul ...

So I don't know how to behave ...?
good or bad ...?!

So stay without sense ... :)
Like a dead person ...

They call me silent ... But no one knows that I am the storm in the depths of the calm sea of ​​my own ...

The eagle in my mind deciding to fly without expecting freedom
Just fly to know more about the life till the audit day ...

Life is very harder than death ... and this is show our more difference

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:)