The Shy One

Chapter 22

He threw my porcelain tea set against the wall. It shattered with a loud crash, the sharp pieces raining all over the floor. I shielded my eyes and pulled my bear onesie over my head further with a whimper. I didn't mean to make him angry.

After I let out a small scream, I looked up at Atty. He was looking at his hands. They were shaking. He turned and made eye contact with me. His eyes were filled with regret and were becoming glossy. 

Without wasting another second he staggered out of the room. I watched, tears on my cheeks, jaw wide, as he left. I swallowed and pulled my hood down. Little time was over now, I guess.

I unzipped my onesie and carefully stepped out of it, folding it on my chest. I stared at my reflection in the window. My own eyes were

 glossy with fear and my arms were shaking under my white T-shirt.

I bent down and looked at the broken teapot. The spout was still intact. I grasped the rough piece between my hands and began to cry. This wasn't okay. This was dangerous.

I glanced at the little porcelain pieces around me and grasped my heart, feeling that similar crumble inside of me.

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Normally when I go to the mall I like to go to Victoria's Secret, Hot topic, the pet store, and Barnes and Noble. But today I went to the two places I hated the most. Lush and Bath and BodyWorks.

Why do I hate them so much? They gave me a headache. But I was looking for things to 'pamper myself' before dinner at Cole's house tonight. I even went to Ulta and bought some sheet masks. 

I needed to relax.

I was still unable to regress. I've tried and I tried. But nothing seemed to work.

I picked up a bottle of warm vanilla sugar lotion when she approached me.

"Hey," Lydia said, rubbing her arm. 

Startled, I looked up and put the lotion down.

"Hey," I said suspiciously, rubbing my arm.

She took a deep breath, "I saw you from Victoria's secret and just thought I'd say hi. Are you looking for some new lotion?" she asked, smoothing the top of her hair into her ponytail.

"Yeah. I have dinner at Cole's tonight," I cleared my throat and looked around. She did the same.

"Um," she licked her lip apprehensively, "I'd like to apologize," she stopped and looked at me, "for my behavior. I know it's long overdue. But, you didn't deserve to be treated the way I treated you. Big or little," she smiled at me shyly and I couldn't help the smile I returned.

"I accept your apology," I say quietly. Lydia looks around, searching the room.

"I," she stopped again, "sorry, it's hard to admit. I don't know if Chase," she stopped and thought for a second before snapping back to reality, "Sorry, I don't know if Chase told you about my...Bipolar Disorder," I nodded and adjusted my bag.

"He did," I smile at her. She nods.

"Well, I'm on medication for it and it kina makes my head cloudy. I've been trying to control it. But it's difficult. Can you...Ummm, maybe tell chase I'm sorry as well?" she asks. I shake my head.

"I mean, I could, but, I feel like Chase would like it a lot more if he heard it from you. In person," I said, smiling at her again. She nodded and started into space before looking around the room again. She reached u and grabbed a bottle of lotion and body wash and added them to me.