DEAD POET'S REVIEW 2.0

12. Notorious Five | DEE

Title of Book: Notorious Five
Author: renegxde

Reviewer: scrubstains
Chapters read: 5 + prologue
Score: 9/10

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

First off, I want to say that you have a beautiful cover. Is it manually edited? I must say, I like the use of dark colors and how the “NOTORIOUS FIVE” is featured in the cover. I also noticed how one of the characters is “faded”. That’s something to look forward to in the story, among other things. Also, the mystery and edginess remain consistent in the synopsis. Nicely done.

Moving forward to the (formal) blurb, you mentioned that “the notorious five are five families siblings of Trenhold”. What did you mean by this? Are they related by blood, or they share a bond that is comparable to it? I suggest revising that part of the blurb. Overall, minimal edits are needed. It also elaborated much of the synopsis you gave the readers.

Let me also say how beautiful the aesthetics of your characters are. I like the palette and the images used.

PLOT AND NARRATION

I like how you managed to put the characters into a spotlight as you introduce them. It helps the readers delineate who is who. I also like how you narrated the interactions between Skylar and the other characters. It is easy to read and to visualize. I find myself looking into the story through Skylar’s eyes. I also like how you manage to put the readers into the story. I can imagine walking down the halls of their school with the characters, or even sitting with them in class.

Some reviewers may find the story narrative heavy, which I like. I am a huge fan of descriptions and introspections, so I appreciate how you filled the blanks for us. 

You opened the story with a scene that introduces us to the characters and the scheme of things in the story. Apparently, the notorious five (or four, at this point) has bad rep. Given that perception, judgment is definitely biased, which I find sad for our group of friends. Turning over a new leaf is an uphill battle.

John, the caretaker watching them during their community service, reminds me a lot of Mr. Finch from Harry Potter. It’s interesting that he has history with the family of notorious five. It sounds like the grudges towards the patients are also carried over to the children.

The third chapter shows us much of Blake’s character and the return of their old friend, Austin. Blake and Sky’s dynamic seems natural, having that affinity with each other. Now that you’ve introduced this, Skylar seems like she has a lot going on internally. There is some form of recklessness in her that she couldn’t help but let out. Either that or she was brought up that way. I also want to ask why this character’s title is reunite, if there is such a word? Is the spelling intentional?

In the fourth chapter, it’s interesting how Skylar hates the Burns siblings so much. I am curious what history they have. There was much hatred especially between Skylar and Jessica. The chaotic part of my personality enjoyed Skylar’s tongue-lashing. Jessica deserved that (as I see it).

Going to the fifth chapter, I must say that Blake is starting to grow on me. I like how precious their friendship is, and how he and Skylar would rather have that rather than risk things. I also like how ballsy Skylar is by being brutally honest with their guidance counselor about what happened between Tyler and Jessica. I agree that Skylar shouldn’t have done that, but then again, what would happen had she not interfered? Bullies like Jessica need to be put in their place, and discrimination because of the history of Skylar’s family shouldn’t be grounds not deal with things seriously. Change takes time, but people like Skylar need tangible proof.

Collectively, the first five chapters have successfully created a solid background for your story, meeting the objective of world building. Friendship, family, and conflict have been introduced well. With that, I can say your story is off to a good start.

TECHNICALS

I actually like how clean the story is. There are only a few edits necessary. There are some hanging sentences as well as run-on sentences. Other observations include confusion with adverb/adjective use, word choice, preposition use, repetitive descriptions, missing words, missing/excessive punctuations, and subject-verb agreement. Nothing glaringly obvious that it disrupts the narrative. Still, I urge that revisions be done. I also admire the consistency by which you narrate in first person POV and in present tense.

FINAL WORDS

The premise is interesting, reminiscent of those TV series like Umbrella Academy or Warrior Nun. That dash of edginess really made this stand out. I have seen that this story has received several accolades, which I think are well-deserved. Keep up the good work!