Dancing Without Music

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Hinata's POV
Three months had passed since I broke up with Kageyama. And I have to say it's been the hardest three months of my life. Everyone knew what had happened and now most practices, I would spike his sets, but we refused to talk. We never even looked at each other. All our communication had stopped. I felt okay. I mean, I thought I felt okay. I pretended to feel okay. I tricked myself. Almost every night I had been locked in my room. Sometimes I'd cry. Sometimes I'd look through old pictures. Other times I'd even go to Natsu's room and ask to sleep with her just to feel warm. She didn't seem to mind. She always had fun braiding my longer hair and chatting about school to me. It made me laugh sometimes. But I was thankful for her. I'd be lost without her.

It was a Tuesday night and preliminaries started tomorrow. I was in Natsu's room once again, sat on her floor as she braided my hair, once again going on about what she did at school today. But then I got caught off guard when she suddenly stopped and climbed off the bed to sit in my lap.
"Shouyo?" She asked making me look down.
"Hm?"
"I-... I miss Tobio." She spoke so quietly and didn't look at me. I almost froze.
"Why do you say that?" I asked, looking to the dark sky out the window.
"Because he made you happy. And now you don't see him anymore, you're always sad and look so lonely. I don't like seeing you lonely." She said, looking up at me eventually.
"Well..... if I'm being honest... I miss him too. But he did something selfish and I can't forgive that."
"If you miss him why don't you talk to him?"
"If we try to talk it'll just be too awkward. We parted on such a bad note and we don't even look at each other anymore. But there's nothing to talk about anyway.... he knows what he did was wrong... and he knows I can't accept that."

"Shouyo you're crying...." Natsu suddenly said and it made my breath hitch. I looked away from the window and pressed my fingers to my cheek. Seeing them damp made me lose it.
I lost myself. I finally cried. I let out everything. I buried my face into Natsu's neck and cried.
"I miss him Natsu! I really miss him. But I can't go back! I... I can't... go back..." I sobbed, feeling guilty at having to burden my little sister with this but I couldn't help it.

"You can go back Shouyo. I want you to go back. Who knows, maybe he feels the same way. Maybe he misses you too." Natsu said.

I looked up and sniffed, wiping my eyes. "You think it could work? But how could I even approach him? I'd be all gahh!, and ack!, and bleugh! I'd just make a fool of myself."

"Then don't ap-apr-appro- ugh. Don't go up to him. Write a note and ask Noya-San to give it him. It Tanaka-san. It'd be easier wouldn't it? It's what my friend did when she wanted to say she liked someone in my class. Or you could send him a text message. You can never mess up a text message ya know?" I let out a little giggle at Natsu's attempt to said approach. But maybe she was right. Maybe I was too rash... I mean... I did know I was going to regret what I said one of these days... Maybe now is the time to make things right. It's not like he had a bad reason for doing what he did. And he didn't want to do it anyway. He was just protecting me even if he could've done something else.
And then I froze. What I said to him...

"And you can damn well bet I'm not going anywhere! Forever I'll stay by your side." That's what I said. That's what I promised him. And yet I broke it.... at the worst possible moment. What was I thinking?! Oh my god I'm such a fool! Why didn't I think this through?! Why has it taken so long to understand what I'd done?!

It's a miracle he still carried on even after what I told him....

"I-I have to make this right..." I mumbled making Natsu giggle.
"Itazura and I will be with you too Shouyo!" She exclaimed as the Crow flew down and landed on my shoulder, dropping my phone onto my hands.

"Go on text him!" Natsu said, getting off my lap and starting to jump excitedly.

This could go so many ways. It could go well. It could make this even worse. It could make us more awkward. It could tear us apart. Or it could kill him. I shuddered. No I have to fix this. I won't let him do that to himself. I still want to keep my promise even if I have already broken it once... 

I unlocked my phone after so much hesitation, but my fingers remained hovering over his contact. I can't do this... God what am I doing?! I'm so stupid.. But I... I can't deny it... I can't. I love him. That won't change. I love him. I still love him. What the hell was I thinking?!

I was snapped from my thoughts when I heard a sigh and suddenly my phone was snatched from my hands.
"Natsu! Give it back!" I whined.

"You were taking too long so I'm doing it." She said before sticking her tongue out at me and typing something on my phone.

She kept her tongue sticking out her mouth as she typed before she suddenly spoke.
"Aaand send. There all sorted now Shouyo!" Natsu giggled before she handed my phone back to me just as our mother walked into the room.

"Sleep time now Natsu. Off to your own room please Shouyo."
I nodded, taking my phone and retreating back to my room after bidding everyone goodnight.
I lay on my bed in the dark contemplating. But I finally opened my phone and looked at the message, biting my lip with tears in my eyes as I read it.

"Hey.... I have to tell you something... meet me on the roof after evening practice tomorrow."

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