BTS SMERALDO THE NOTES 2 (Edited & Translated)

Yoongi: 13 June Year 22

Finding My Own Place And Keeping A Place for Each Other
Part 4

ａ／ｎ
Yoongi's dream has been put in italics for a better reading experience!

I went to the hospital to see Jungkook, but I couldn't find it in myself to go into his room. From where I was at the hospital door, Jungkook looked dead. I knew he wasn't, but I couldn't handle it.

Jungkook stopped coming to my workroom after the beach. I tried to remember the last time I saw Jungkook. It was when we came back from the trip.

I remember when we were walking to the station, I was talking to Hoseok and Jungkook ran ahead of us. We never saw him after that. And then he got into an accident.

Standing at that hospital door, I remembered everything. The fire in the drum at the construction site. My mother's room, dark, and the sound of the piano playing in the distance, Jungkook playing the piano in the store.

I imagined what it was like for Jungkook to fall into the road. How scared and lonely he must have felt. And how much pain he must have been in.

And now he lay here in the hospital, looking half dead. I couldn't deal with this. I moved away from the door and made my way out of the hospital.

I drank. I needed to forget about all of this. And the only way to do that was by getting drunk.

I got kicked out of the bar and decided to walk the streets. I slid down a wall and fell asleep there.

When I woke up, I was running. I wasn't a child. I was a high schooler. I was running through the streets.

There was a sense of urgency in the air. I didn't spare a glance around and kept my eyes forward. My feet were determined to get me somewhere.

But where was I going? Why was it so urgent? It felt as if this had happened before. But I couldn't remember.

Lost in my thoughts, I sprained my ankle and stumbled. When I fell, I woke up.

I woke up with a jolt. My heart was pounding. My head spun. I tried to stand up and my muscles screamed in protest. I held onto the wall as I got up and I started to walk.

I had no destination. I didn't care where I was going. Onlookers gave me strange glances, rightfully so, and avoided me.

I was always like this. Aimless, with no purpose. If someone told me to run now, I wouldn't be able to. And everyone around me was wary of me.

I stopped and looked around. I was on the same road I'd been running on in my dream. Why was I walking in such a hurry? What was I looking for? No one told me to start walking and no one was forcing me to. It had just been a dream.

I saw the green light across the crosswalk. In my dream it had been red. And I'd gone across anyways and made my way between the traffic. Now the road was quiet.

I ran across the road and carried on running even when I'd gone across. I felt nauseous. I took a few deep breaths and kept going. I ran past the elementary school and the police station.

What I was seeing now was exactly like my dream.

I arrived at the front gate of SungJu Jeil High School. All the lights were on in the classes. In my dream it had been dark. I hadn't set foot here after being expelled. I couldn't believe I was here.