Always by my side

Nine

Jim POV

"Five years? Are you kidding me? Jim! You can't just leave me for five years!"

Sarah looked at me with her big, beautiful, blue eyes.

"Well.. I mean you could come with us..."

I scratched the back of my head, looking at her a little unsure of what to do. I had been so excited for the mission, but now, looking into the sad eyes of Sarah, I wasn't so sure anymore.

"Jim, you know I can't... I have my own assignments."

I could see how hard she was trying not to be too miserable.

Then she took a deep breath and managed to build up a smile

"No, Jim, listen; I'm very excited for you, okay? Sorry for being so unsupportive just now, that wasn't fair. I am excited and I know you are, too. It's gonna be great and we can call each other!"

I looked at her, how hard she was trying to be happy for me, when some part of her cleary wasn't.

"Thank you for trying. I know it's a long time. We'll make it work somehow, okay?"

"I don't even know why I'm so upset, I'm so sorry."

I pulled her into a tight hug, which she returned.

Soaking in the smell of her perfume and feeling her body against mine, I expected to feel relaxation and forget about everything around us, as I had so many times before. But instead, I tightend up. Her smell of vanilla and roses made me a little dizzy, and feeling her body so close to mine made my skin tingle.

What the hell is that feeling?

Sarah broke away from the hug slowly.

"Sorry, Jim, I gotta go, I have to train the new officers"

My brain was still dizzy from the hug and the weird feeling, which led to Sarah leaving my quarters without me giving her any kind of reply.

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"I still can't believe you're making me do this, Jim. Five years in uncharted space? Are you trying to get us all killed?!"

"Could you just relax, Bones? It's gonna be fine!"

"Like hell it is!"

I couln't help but roll my eyes at my best friend and his undying positive attitude towards anything and everything.

We reached the shuttle, Chekov, Uhura, Spock and Sulu already waiting for us.

"Where's Scotty?", I asked

"He's talking to Sarah, I think", Uhura answered.

"Well, he better hurry, the shuttle is leaving in 10 Minutes", Spock interjected.

"As if the Enterprise would leave without its chief engineer"

Scotty and Sarah approched from behind me, Scotty having made that remark.

"No, of course we wouldn't" I reassured my friend.

"Nevertheless, we should get in the shuttle now"

"Spock is right, we should really go now"

Uhura made her way to Sarah, hugging her goodbye.

Chekov, Sulu and Scotty followerd her example, Spock only nodding at her.

When they had all made their way to the shuttle, Bones went over to Sarah.

"You know, I trusted you to talk him out of this, so... thanks for nothing, I guess"

Sarah just laughed at him, hugging him tightly.

After Bones had followed the other five, Sarah and I were alone.

"So... Uh... Have a good... journey, I guess"

It was more a question than a statement.

When did our friendship become so weird?

"Jeah, thanks"

I scratched the back of my head, unsure of what to do or say

"See ya" Sarah turned around and made her way toward the exit.

What the hell? What is happening here?

"Woah wait! Where's my hug?"

She turned around, a weird smile on her face

"You'll get it when you get back"

Then she pushed the door open and was gone.

I was left standing on front of the shuttle, confused and a little alone.