Blue Butterflies in my Stomach (Gonta Gokuhara x reader)

21

Gonta made it to his cabin faster than you could follow him. You arrived there about 5 minutes after he did, and you gently knocked on his door.

No answer.

Your heart began pounding.

I fucked up...

The door opened. You were greeted with a Gonta you'd never seen before. His tie was half tied. His hair was messier than you've ever seen it. He just looked... troubled.

"Are you doing okay, honeybee?" You asked gently, a hand on the doorframe.

He shook his head, removing his glasses and placing them on his dresser.

You knew that meant he was definitely about to cry.
Moments after thinking that, he let out a quiet sob.

You crawled up to him, hugging him tightly.

"I'm so so so sorry, love bug. I never wanted to make you do too much or make you-" you began to apologize when Gonta interrupted you.

"Not y/n's fault," he cried.

You retrieved a brush from his Bathroom and began to brush out his hair to help him calm down.

"Gonta want to tell butterfly something," he said, his intonation flatter and more serious than usual.
"Go ahead, Gonta," you reply. He took a deep breath.

"When Gonta was tiny, somebody... did bad things to him. And they... made Gonta feel weird. Gonta was reminded of that when his butterfly kissed him... and it embarrassed Gonta so he ran away," he sighed, "Gonta didn't want to tell y/n because he feels like it was his fault that it happened, because it felt good..." he sobbed. You were completely taken aback by all of this. It was absolutely awful to hear.

You wrapped a blanket around him and then wrapped yourself around him as best as you could.

"Gonta, you need to know that none of that was your fault, okay? You were a little boy. You never asked for that to happen to you. And just because it felt good doesn't mean you wanted it. Does that make sense?" You explained calmly. He shrugged.

"Just think about it, okay? I know its hard for you to understand, but please just listen to me when I say that it was not your fault." You reiterated. He was silent as you began to braid his hair.

"I'm sorry about making you uncomfortable, honey. I was scared about hurting you anyways but I never knew you went through this, too," you apologized, finishing the braid.

He turned around to face you. "Gonta isn't uncomfortable about you. Gonta uncomfortable because... of that..." he mumbled, "Gonta thinks he wants to make his butterfly feel good. She deserves it for being so good to Gonta," he smiled, wiping his tears away.

"No, no, baby. If you just want to cuddle, that'll make me feel good, too. I really don't want to hurt you."

"Maybe y/n is hurting Gonta by saying no when she does want this," he frowned.