|51| "it's not u, it's me"

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when I tell you "It's not u, it's me"
trust me, for i'm telling the truth.

I don't have to smile merely out of habit with you;
you make me laugh with abandon.

I don't have to pretend texting isn't a chore for me;
my eyes remain glued to the phone, awaiting your replies.

I've never had chills down my spine simply after hearing a voice;
the sound of your voice makes me lose my mind.

what I'm trying to say is:
you're God's finest creation
and your mere presence brightens up my day.
you're the sun, Darling
and I'm only the faintest
of the stars.
I can try forever
but I can never match
your potency
so forgive me,
when I tell you
I can't believe you're giving me
the time of your day.

what I'm trying to say is:
I'm going to leave
before you dig out
my most closeted skeletons
and realize how you and I
are the opposite pieces
of a chess game
and not even in a way that it's cute;
you're the white knight, Honey,
and I'm a lowly black pawn.

so what I'm trying to say is:
let me silently scratch your heart
and leave,
before you find out
I'm just a mediocre
star in a bright, bright night sky
and decide to break my heart
into a thousand little pieces.


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