𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐄'𝐒 𝐉𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐋.ʜᴀɴᴊɪ ᴢᴏᴇ̈

『28』Breaking Down

Sunday, June 2, 850 at 06:43

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"Please, girl... Just a little faster!" you urged your horse, digging the heels of your boots into her sides to encourage her to comply with your wishes. The produced breeze from her speed caused a false wind-like blow to push your (H/C) hair back a little, and you couldn't help but mindlessly steer your mare back to where you had been no longer than two hours ago -in a much more stressed mindstate than you had been before. It was as soon as you left the titan testing area that you softened up, dropping your tougher demeanour and picking up your usual, more kind and outgoing one -although that doesn't mean that you're exactly in the best of moods as of right now. The event of what had just happened was catching up to you, and you felt your eyes water a small bit, soon finding yourself blinking them a few times to try and rid of any starting-to-form tears, 'Not now! C'mon (Y/N), you were doing so well and staying so strong, don't stop now!'

A newfound determined flash swept across your (E/C) orbs, and while your eyes were still wetter than they would normally be, you found yourself no longer on the brink of tears, 'I can't tell if I was about to cry because I've let Hanji down in a sense, because that they were killed, or because they were killed because I failed to protect them, let alone capture their killers.'

You shook your head at the thought, trying to rid it from your head as the castle popped into view, and not long after that did you slide your body off of your now trotting horse -given that she was quickly approaching the building- and catching your balance with your hands on the ground, pushing your legs against the floor as you willed yourself to run forwards before fully stabilizing. A few staggered leaps forwards, you reached the door and pulled it open, not bothering to close it as you soon stomped your feet onto the steps and rushed to the hallways with loud footfalls, not caring about any potential slumber you could be interrupting seeing as this was much more important than someone getting a few more minutes in -if anyone was even sleeping anymore. As soon as you reached the door your hand flew to its knob, tightly grasping the metal contraption and hurriedly twisting it to grant you entry before you pushed yourself through the splintery barrier.

"...!" came your breathless gasp.

You found yourself wordless and out of breath as you panted at the doorway, effectively startling Hanji and Eren by your sudden appearance -who seemed to have been doing what they had been doing when you left. It was almost immediately that the brunette stood up from her seat, furniture almost tipping over at how quickly she stood up before hastily going over to you. "(Y/N), what... happened...?" she said as she stood before you and seemed to bring her face closer to the left side of your own -and if you weren't so distressed you probably would have blushed at not only her concern, but also at how close she was to you, "Are you ok?"

You could only let out a rapid nod of your head, before panting out, "Sawney a-and Bean," while putting a hand to your chest, trying to calm your erratic heart a little from all the adrenaline rushing throughout your bloodstream -partially from your prior movement and partially because of the news you were about to break to her, "D-Dead."

Her eyebrows furrowed and her skin gained a touch of paleness to it, "Dead?"

"I couldn't stop... them." you said with a heavy heart, finally catching your breath and looking down at the ground, being overall ashamed at having to admit your incompetence in front of the woman you had the biggest crush on, "Them...? People killed them without reason...?" she asked, observing the floor's stone bricks for a moment with deeply upset eyes before looking back up. "ᴵˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʷʰʸ ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ᵃˡˡ ᵇᵃⁿᵍᵉᵈ ᵘᵖ?" she queried in a whisper, lightly bringing her right hand up to the side of your face you just now realized was probably bruised from that punch earlier, knuckles brushing against the flesh with her gentle kiss of contact, "Y-Yeah..." you said, trying your best to not lean into her touch. So badly did you want to pull her into a hug, just allow yourself to fall into her arms and have her play with your hair as she shushed quiet comforts into your ear, holding you in a protective manner against her chest.