Chapter 3 - Realisation

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Chapter specific warnings - detailed description of a funeral :(


As soon as these two words left Katsuki's lips, it felt like someone squeezed your lungs and took away your ability to breathe. You had been so caught up in your state of denial that you had suppressed the thought of the funeral.

"What do you want to wear?" Katsuki asked, looking at you while you were sitting on your bed.

You didn't answer, nor did you move. You were entirely still once again. Katsuki sighed and opened your wardrobe. You watched him rummaging through your clothes until he eventually resurfaced, holding a black dress in his hands.

"What about this one?" He asked, looking at you.

You shook your head. "I'm not going."

He carefully placed your dress over a chair before walking over and kneeling down in front of you. He put his hands on your knees. "I understand that you don't want to go, but I think that one day you will regret it deeply if you stay here."

"No."

He sighed again. "I will be there with you the entire time, okay? You're not alone, (y/n)."

You looked down, averting his gaze. "If I go, then that means I have to accept the fact that he's gone," you explained quietly. "And I can't do that."

Katsuki placed one of his hands on your face, stroking your cheek lightly. It was breaking his heart to see you like this. He wanted to oblige and stay home with you, protect you from the harsh reality, but he also knew that not going would be something that you would both regret later on.

He didn't want to make you feel bad, hated using this technique to convince you, but he didn't think there was any other way to get you to come with him. He took a deep breath.

"He needs you there, (y/n)," Katsuki said, his hand still touching your cheek. You looked into his eyes immediately, trying to find an answer to the question that Katsuki's words had just brought up in you.

"This is his last journey, and he needs his wife there to see him off," Katsuki explained, already regretting that he was guilt-tripping you into this. "I know it hurts, but please do it for his sake."

You felt like such a selfish idiot for not having thought about this sooner. Of course, you had to be there for him. He was your husband, you couldn't just abandon him. Katsuki was right.

"Okay," you nodded. "But you will be there with me. Right, Suki?"

His heartbeat increased rapidly. The way you looked at him was too much for him to handle. "Of course, (y/n). I'll be right by your side," he promised, pulling you into a hug that you immediately reciprocated. He breathed in the scent of your hair and hated himself for loving you this much. It was inappropriate. He was the worst friend imaginable.

After that, you let Katsuki help you get ready. You were surprised at how gentle and patient he was with you. He helped you with your outfit and hair, making sure you looked somewhat presentable. You were so thankful to have him by your side.

You really didn't understand why he hadn't found a woman to settle down with yet. You knew that he had this odd relationship with a woman that he didn't want anyone else to meet, but you also knew that he wasn't into her at all. It was as though he refused to open up to anyone and show his true self. It was a shame because he was an amazing person and would be able to make the woman he loved very happy.

You looked at him and caught him staring at you. "What?"

It looked as though he was blushing when he realised that you had noticed him staring. "N-nothing," he said, scratching his head. "You just look very pretty with your hair like that."

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