1 (jaylor) wisteria hearts and caged folk songs

chapter eight.

Once she started writing, she just couldn't stop. She was recording lyrics on her phone as they came to her head while she began writing down notes in her notebook. The words spilled out of her as if someone had splattered ink across the pages. She didn't even have time to wonder if Joe was thinking about her. She didn't feel tired, she didn't feel cold or afraid. She felt like she used to when writing. Powerful, unstoppable and unafraid.

She wrote until the sun began to peek over the rooftops, beaming golden light into the room and illuminating her pages. It just felt so good to get it all out there, to finally be allowed to write it down. To be unafraid of the repercussions of it all.

Half of the words and phrases she'd written down wouldn't be able to be shared with other people, but some of them would make perfect songs. She wouldn't be ready to release them for a long time, she'd have to make sure that she was healed from the trauma that Adam had put her through. She had to be sure that she could sing these words in front of people without crumbling. She had to be ready to face it all again, and she wasn't sure she'd ever be ready to face those ghosts.

Sometime after the sun had risen, she fell asleep with ink covering her hands and lyrics scribbled all around her.

Joe sat on the couch, Olivia brushing up against his leg wanting attention and Meredith sitting on his lap, purring away. He wouldn't tell Taylor this, but the world was quite literally blowing up her story. People had pieced it together. Taylor - seen walking through the streets in the evening, a tall stranger taking her home... Adam being taken away by police from the famous artist Joe Alwyn's apartment... the photo Taylor had posted. They figured it all out in an hour. Her fans were incredible.
"Your Mom is pretty amazing," Joe whispered to Meredith, who gave a small meow in response.
He couldn't actually believe how viral her story had gone. Well, he really could, and Taylor had already warned him about the fact that nothing she ever did went unnoticed. People from all over the world were supporting her, finding comfort in the fact that they weren't alone. People related to her story, to how she'd been made to feel.

He wished that Taylor could see herself the way that he saw her. He wished that she could see how well she was doing. She'd looked so heartbroken when he'd shown her those scars, and he wished that she could see how much she'd already changed. Her sparkle was slowly coming back. She needed to see that she deserved to be kind to herself too.
"How long was I asleep for?" A voice said from behind him. "Aww, the cats love you!" She sat down beside him, and Joe smiled. She had ink on her cheek, on her fingertips.
"I have ink on my face, don't I?" Taylor asked with a smile. Joe nodded and she sighed. "I have to... I have to buy some more things to take to my Mom's for Christmas." She told him nervously.
"I can go with you," Joe offers. "There are a few things I need to get too."
"You won't want to come with me when you see what it's like." Taylor already felt stressed about what Joe was going to think. Would he get scared off? See the crowds of cameras and head for the hills? Sometimes it was overwhelming, even for her - and she'd been in the spotlight since she was sixteen.
"Yes I will," Joe took her hand. "You don't need to worry about me. I wouldn't tell you that I can cope with it if I can't." He smiled. "I just want to spend time with you. I don't care what we do. Nothing else matters."
"Well... thank you." She leaned her head on his shoulder. "Maybe... maybe afterwards we could get a coffee or something? But really. It's so crazy and my security will be there... and it's just... it's pretty awful for me even though I know what it's like. It won't be pleasant for you when you're not used to it."
"It doesn't bother me, love. Why don't we go shopping, and then we could get a coffee and go for a walk? There must be a park around here somewhere."

Taylor beamed at the idea. "That's the best idea! I haven't been on a walk in so long and it will be so nice to be outside with the cool air but with a hot drink!" She blushed when she realised how over-excited she was. Adam would have told her to stop talking. Adam wouldn't have replied or would have said she was stupid. That she needed to grow up and stop being so excited about such small things.
But Joe just looked at her and smiled.
"It's nearing Christmas, too! So that means that hopefully, people will be too busy Christmas shopping to go for a walk in the park. I love to go on hikes, it's a shame that there aren't more around here." Joe grinned when he saw that sparkle come back, her sadness becoming evanescent, vanishing in a moment. "That's one thing I miss about the UK," he admitted.
"When we go to my parent's house for Christmas, we'll be able to find loads of different hikes and walks to do!" She felt so strange. She felt weird that Joe never shut her down, that he let her be excited about the smallest of things. "Or if we ever go to my Los Angeles house - there are so many walks around there."
"You'll have to come home with me sometime, and you'll be blown away by all the different places we can go - and there are literally little coffee shops everywhere, so we'll always be able to have a hot drink." Joe smiled because the sparkle that he'd seen yesterday in her eyes was back again. That sparkle that he loved so much. That sparkle that he'd been waiting for years to see.