Peter: Hi mister pedophile!
??? : kid your alive!
??? : I'm not a pedophile wth?!
Peter has renamed ??? to Mr pedophile
Mr pedofile: why am I a pedophile?
Peter : cause your old, and you text kids.
Mr pedophile : you texted me first!
Peter : and you texted me back.
Mr pedophile : I -
Peter: 😏
Mr pedophile : whatever, how are you alive right now?
Peter : I googled instructions and stitched it up.
Mr pedophile : did you take the bullet out?
Peter : ............
Mr pedophile : Kid?
Mr pedophile : please tell me you took the bullet out.
Peter : I - uh
Mr pedophile : YOU DIDN'T TAKE THE BULLET OUT?
Peter : the instructions didn't say to!!!
Mr pedophile : where did you get your instructions from?!
Peter : .......WikiHow
Mr pedophile : jesus christ
Peter : don't curse the Lord that's bad!
Mr pedophile : please go to a hospital
Peter : you know what....yea I'm gonna go to a hospital.
Mr pedophile : oh thank god
Peter : mhm yep going now bye
Mr pedophile : Ok just get that bullet out k?
YOU ARE READING
Spiderman/Peter Parker Oneshots
FanfictionOneshots of spiderman aka Peter parker in his spidery world. Sometimes i get stuck, so don't be afraid to request! Contains: -Field trips -Instagram -wrong number -soulstone -irondad -avengers -fluff -a truckload of angst All rights go to marvel :D
