Five Seasons: N.Flying series [On-going]

PAGE 46 [SDS]

Chapter 11 | people throw rocks at things that shine

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NARA

“It's been a while since we've done this.” Dongsung said as we walked side by side. It was a cold night.

“Done what?”

“Walk together. Moon. Stars. Night sky.” He said with a smile.

I shook my head smiling. “Dongsung, that was two years ago. We were young and dumb.”

“I prefer the word ‘romantic’.” He said, turning around and walking backwards to face me, his hands shoved inside the pockets of his bomber jacket.

“Well, you can't get ‘romantic’ with a friend. You told me you wanna be friends!” I said, grinning.

“That's because I thought that's what you wanted.” He said with a chuckle.

We looked at each other quietly for a moment. I shook my head, looking away.

“Thanks for coming tonight.” He said.

I think the speed that we walked was getting slower by each second, deep inside, dreading the time we reach the end of the crossroad.

“No, thank you for inviting me. I needed the fun. Feels like these days all I do is work and study.” I said.

I couldn't help but notice the way his hair danced slightly by the cold wind, or the way the moon was lit up behind his head like a halo, or the way the tip of his nose and his cheeks were turning red from the cold.

Dongsung turned around and walked beside me again. “I'm glad you had your fun, but I'm serious.” He sighed, “You know, all my life, I was never permanent in anything. Not in my mom's life because she left us. Not in the rest of my family's life because I left at such a young age. Not in the first band that I had and cherished. Not in the bands that followed after that. Not in the houses I've lived in.” He paused and glanced at me, “But N.Flying, this band... it feels different. It kinda feels like home, you know? I like being with them. I like playing with them. I would like to stay.”

I stopped walking and smiled at him warmly. “That's so good, Dongsung. I'm happy that you're happy with where you are right now.”

He shrugged. “Yeah, but sometimes I can't help but think if it's going to last long. They've all been together for such a long time, they go way backㅡwhat if I never catch up? What if I'm forever confused by inside jokes and unable to relate when they reminisce?”

I shook my head. “There's no such thing. You live with them and you're in it for the long haul. You'll make memories and you'll have inside jokes that you'd all recall together later in life.”

Dongsung took a deep breath and smiled. “Maybe you're right.”

“I sense another ‘but’ coming." I said.

He grinned helplessly. “It's just that you saw Kwangjin hyung. He's... he's so charming and handsome and amazing at bass. What if I never amount to that?”

“You've really been thinking about this, haven't you? Is that why you seem a little uncomfortable tonight?”

“Yeah, it's just... pressure.”

“Dongsung, come on. You will never amount to him because you are not him. You are you. You are your own version of yourself. You're your own bassist. You're your own charming. You're your own handsome.”

Dongsung smiled. “You just said I'm handsome.”

I chuckled, “Were you just fishing for compliments?”