Love The Way You Lie

22: NO GRAVITY

Love The Way You Lie

Derek Shepherd, your husband, hits you- but you stayed until you couldn't stand up anymore. Your best friend Mark Sloan helped you leave him and you two had some adulterous sex. When you see Derek again in Seattle with another woman, all you want is to save her from him. You didn't mean to fall in love with her. She wasn't supposed to fall in love with you, either. But you both did, anyway.

-Addison Forbes Montgomery, for Meredith Grey

MerAdd. Meddison. F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. Rated E for Explicit. Grey's Anatomy & Private Practice Crossover.

CW: Domestic Violence. Unhealthy Relationships - Physically & Emotionally Abusive Addek & MerDer. Also briefly okay (non-abusive), Maddison & Mark/Derek.

*This story is entirely fictional. Please seek professional help for abusive relationships in yourself and others. Take all abuse seriously.*

Chapter 22: NO GRAVITY

Broken, disillusioned, I've been dizzy with confusion...

You wake up again, and this time with less of the disorienting dreams.

The room stops spinning so much, and you can concentrate for a little longer.

You turn to see if Meredith is still lying next to you, but she isn't, and that makes you nervous.

You know that this either means she's recovered or that she's gotten worse.

You pray with everything that you have that she's well (and you don't even pray to begin with!).

When you hear footsteps approaching, you know it can't be a good sign.

You recognize that volume and pace of footfalls, and you know that he's on his way to find you.

"Help," you say weakly, and you realize that this is the first thing you've spoken since you've landed here.

No one hears you though, the nurses must have done their rounds on you ages ago, and you can hear Derek getting nearer to you.

Fucking hell.

"Addison," he says to you when he walks into the room.

There's no compassion in his voice, just mostly venom, with a touch full of pity.

"Derek-" you croak weakly.

"She hates you, you know," he feeds lies to you.

You nod along though, because you're not going to fight him.

"She thinks you did this. You set her up, and you made her walk into those walls and now she's all bruised. She doesn't feel sorry for you, and she won't be by to visit you either," he announces to you proudly.

He must have had her banned from your room somehow.

You're sad and lost because you miss her desperately, and as much as you seek to protect her, you want to talk with her anyway.

"She's not coming," Derek deadpans.

You sigh.

"I'll be by later," he adds on.

"Okay," you nod, and it still hurts a little to move.

Beyond all of your wildest expectations, Meredith does manage to contact you though.

It comes in the form of a note underneath your lunch tray she must have had someone sneak into your room.

"I'm well. I'll be by if I can. Take care, Dr. Meredith."

It's short and sweet, professional even, but you understand her subtext.

She cares about you, and you could live on for days on her small gestures of affection alone. You scribble a response on the back of it as you hand in your food. You expect the nurse has been bribed somehow to keep this a secret, and it's the only chance that you have to communicate.

You hear someone talk about your prognosis, and at least, it's not as bad as you thought it might be.

No permanent damage, but several weeks at least in the hospital.

You take it as a rest period and you close your eyes again.

Supper comes by, and you check for another note but this time there isn't one. You're disappointed, but you could understand that once a day is enough risk for now, especially with Derek having promised he'd stop by later.

When he comes by your room you can tell he's been drinking, and he's off-schedule so he might as well if he wants to.

"Now, are you going to tell everyone a good story about how you got in here, or am I going to have to knock you out again?" Derek threatened you, and you're half-surprised he's even giving you this kind of option.

"I won't talk," you sigh.

"Good," he agrees. "Besides, they'd never believe you anyway," Derek says as he leaves again, slamming the door behind him just to startle you and make your ears ring.

When you wake up he's gone again.

Your days are filled with more of this; paper notes with a few gentle sentences, and more visits and threats, and not much communication with anyone else.

You catch the nurses looking at you with pity sometimes, and it just makes you sad for yourself.

You wonder what kind of stories they've been fed about your 'accident,' and why they definitely shouldn't ask you about it.

Your other bruises heal along with your injuries, and you're almost ready to remove the sutures you've made yourself.

You wonder if they'd found them all as they'd been operating, but they haven't asked you about them, so maybe they couldn't place the difference between all of the incidents.

Your favorite note from Meredith shows up a week in, reading:

"Stay strong, you'll be back in the O.R in no time. Your patients miss you. -Dr. Meredith."

Work is something you've always been proud of, and you're glad that this outside source of evaluation still has high regard for you. You write Meredith another note asking if he could call your brother for you. That would be a nice treat to pass him a message saying that you're okay.

You don't find out though, because you're discharged that evening, and they call Derek to pick you up and bring you home again.

They carry you out in a wheelchair, as is the protocol, and watch as he straps you into the passenger seat.

Goodbye Seattle Grace, hello Trailer until you can walk again.

As you leave with him, you can see through the window that Meredith's nose is pressed to the glass and that she's waving at you. She's putting on a brave face, but you can tell that she's scared because her other fist is curled up in a ball, and there are tears streaming all down her beautiful face.

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***** END OF CHAPTER TWENTY TWO