Hearts Of Love ~ Louis Partridge

10| Two

!contains swearing!

"Y/N, please, for God's sake tell me what's wrong, please"

That's the same sentence I have been hearing for the past half an hour since we sat in the car. This whole thing was so rushed that I couldn't inform Louis about all this. And I know even if I did tell him, I  would start crying and never stop. I hate, hate this, I hate this.

I hate being able to feel weak in front of others. I hate when others feel pity for me, I am not weak. I don't want make an impression on people, them thinking I am one of those stupid girls who cry like idiots.

I don't remember myself shedding tears for anyone in the previous years. I rarely cry in front of people, all I do is rush to the bathroom and let it out. Crying in front of others makes me feel inferior.

I am sure Louis was just trying to comfort me, but all I want for now is to get home for once.

He sighed and connected his phone to play something. Adjusting the knobs, he played "Night changes "by 1D. I just wasn't feeling like it today, even though I love that song. I pressed the stop button and leaned back on the seat.

"Please, Louis" I said, my voice still raspy.

He pursed his lips not saying anything. I looked at him while clenching my fists to stay in posture. All of the past events were crossing my mind, and then a tear rolled down my cheeks, shit.

And then I felt the car come to a stop with a jerk. I looked around to see we were at the gas station, and on the right side was a small snack shop.

"I'll be right back" he said and rushed to the shop.

I didn't respond him or anything. But just after a minute or two, he came back with a bag in his hand. He sat down, throwing the bag on the back seat.

We reached home and Louis opened the front door with the key he had. As soon as the door opened, I rushed inside and removed my shoes. I went running to my room when I felt someone grab my wrist softly.

I turned around to see Louis standing.

"What exactly do you want from me" I asked softly.

"I just want to know what  happened y/n, you-you look so disturbed. I just want to help here"

I took his hand off my wrist, placing his hand back.

"You can't help" my voice cracked again, what the-

I crossed my arms and went rushing to my room. I slammed the door shut as I heard a deep sigh from Louis.

I took my jacket off and stood in front of the mirror examining my face with my hand.

"Am I not beautiful enough? "And I laughed sarcastically.

I sighed and changed into my pjs. I could not sleep with all these thoughts crossing my mind. So instead, I decided to jot down all these things in my diary. The more I proceeded towards the end, my blood started boiling up, again.

So I grabbed my phone and scrolled through Instagram, AND blocked Matt, yes!

I decided to pull an all nighter. I brushed my teeth and lay on my bed. Staring at the ceiling I remembered the first time I met matt, the places we went to and the memories we shared.

Even if I wanted to burst into tears, I couldn't as my head started to ache.

I stood up and let out a sigh.