The first time you heard about quarantine, you were somewhat happy. You’d have more time to be home, relax and focus on yourself and the things you wanted to do but had no time for.
The production for the latest project Chris was working on had been put on hold, which meant he would also have more time to be home with you. It was great news for the two of you because in those three months previous to the pandemic breakout you had only seen each other twice, since the production was set in Atlanta.
The first months went great. Finally having a chance to spend time with Chris and Dodger doing nothing but enjoy yourselves. Breakfasts in bed; hours in silence reading your favorite books or reading to each other; dancing in the kitchen; trying out new recipes; movie nights. Everything felt so new, so promising. It was probably the most time you had ever been together. And it felt amazing.
The thing is, nothing last forever. And that state of ecstasy didn’t either. As the months kept passing by with little to no changes at all, the excitement of experiencing something new started to fade.
In time, Chris had to start working again. ASP meetings; online conferences; Zoom meetings; interviews; the whole thing. Which meant he was busier. And so you found yourself spending a great amount of time alone and without much to do. You tried working from home too, in hopes to get some distraction, but it was quite harder because the modality didn’t quite match your profession. In consequence, at some point the isolation started to weigh on you.
No matter how much you tried to hide it, Chris had noticed this and attempted to talk it out with you. To help you feel better. With so much on his plate, you didn’t want him to worry about you. So you did what you thought was best and started shutting him out so he couldn’t see it.
You missed being able to go out. To do those simple activities that gave your life a little normality. Going out for coffee; interact with others; visiting a museum or simply see a different scenario . It was crazy how much the lack of such ordinary activities changed your mood. You loved your home, but you felt like you had had enough of it. It was starting to suffocate you.
And that suffocation started to wake up in the middle of the night. Like right now. Your heart beat fast inside your chest for no reason, driving the sleep away from your body.
Looking to your side, you found Chris sound asleep. Not wanting to bother him, you decided to step out of the bed and go get you some water. Looking out the kitchen window, with the glass of water and ice in hand, the sight of a clear sky tempted you into going outside.
The cold night breeze embraced your body as you stepped out, soothing your beating heart. The feel of the recently cut grass under your feet caressing your skin as you walked towards the middle of the backyard. Sitting down on the grass, you looked up at the sky admiring it’s immensity. Star gazing was something that had always mesmerized you. Billion-year dead stars that kept shining for you.
“I brought you a blanket.” Chris said almost giving you a heart attack. You had been so immerse in the stars and your thoughts that you hadn’t noticed him approaching you.
“Thanks.” You said holding onto the piece of fabric he had wrapped around your shoulders. “What are you doing up this late?” You asked him as he sat right beside you.
“I was wondering the same thing.” He replied with a hoarse voice. A sleepy smile plastered on his lips as he stared at you. His hair going in all directions, making you smile briefly too.
“I needed some air.” You replied after a deep sigh, focusing back on the sky above you.
Without another word, Chris moved even closer to you. Wrapping his right arm around your shoulders, he planted a sweet kiss on your temple making your insides shake. Your eyes starting to fill with unshed tears you didn’t knew you had been saving.
“You know I’m here for you, right?” He whispered without moving and each away from you.
“Yeah.” You mumbled with some difficulty as your voice broke in the process. The tears falling freely now, leaving wet traces all the way from your cheeks to you chin and neck.
“Hey…” He whispered. His left arm finding it ways to you right cheek, softly turning your head to face him. “What’s wrong?” He asked in the same tone, even though you were alone.
“I don’t know.” You replied shaking your head as the tears kept streaming down your face.
“It’s okay.” Chris said pressing a kiss on your forehead as he held you tightly in his arms. “It’s okay.” He repeated soothingly.
He knew his actions meant more than any word he could say to cheer you up. So, instead of talking, he proceeded to hold you in his arms letting you know he was there for you and that everything was going to be okay. His arms were your safe place. His shoulders somewhere you could cry on without shame. You were each other support whenever the other was going through a rough patch. And your relationship always came out stronger after everything.
“I’m sorry.” You apologized once you had calmed yourself down.
“You don’t have to apologize for anything love.” He told you. “I understand it can be hard sometimes, and I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you. Even if it means just sitting outside in the middle of the night to cry together.” He said. “Because that’s what couples do right? Cry together at night?” He joked.
“I don’t think so, no.” You laughed wiping your moist cheeks.
“They don’t know what they’re missing on then.” He replied wrapping his arms around you in a tight embrace. “I love you.” He told you pulling his face apart to take a look at yours.
“I love you.” You told him doing the same he had previously done.
“I love you.” He repeated one more time, looking into your eyes.
“Thanks.” You replied grinning as you looked away.
“Uh-Uh.” He said shaking his head while turning your face back to him. “Say it.” He gently ordered.
“Why don’t I just show you instead?” You said bringing your face closer to his.
“Even better.” He replied, a dopey smile on his lips as you closed the distance between the two of you.
