The Autumn Prince

44. Touching a Dream

Death marks an end and it's hard to comprehend life beyond it, even for those who are left behind. Katherine gave me the chance to be a hero, but once it was clear that I was too traumatized to provide comfort, she stepped forward, offering support to everyone though she grieved as much or more, crying only when she was alone with me. My own tears had been burned away, but she somehow knew that sharing hers would soften my heart so it could heal.

Surprisingly, the Fae encouraged us to attend Gloria's funeral. Finn, Meg, and Miss Gold accompanied us as protection, to watch for signs of my dad or idle members of either court. Miss Gold stood out in her customary white, and the only accommodations she had made were a pair of long gloves, and a wide brimmed hat with a veil. I had never seen Finn in anything but denim, but she showed up in a somber black dress with matching heels, and her wild, copper hair had been brushed and styled. She was radiant.

The girls and I kept to the back row, far behind Glory's family. Her father had canceled his business in Denmark and was comforting his wife, a handsome woman with the darkest skin I'd ever seen, while Gloria's younger brother and sister sat on either side. The family would never know she'd been tortured by an otherworldly psychopath, that she had lost her mind in the end, that she had given up a piece of herself in death, and that I carried it within me just a few rows away. If by some miracle I managed to defeat Caratacos, they'd never know that their daughter had been avenged. I felt ashamed at the lie.

We didn't stay long in that room for fear of what my presence could do to a crowd already overwhelmed with emotion, but we followed them to the graveyard and bore witness as they lowered Glory's casket into the ground. Since I was unable to mingle without serious risk, I waited in the van Finn had provided while the girls paid their respects to the family. We returned to Meridian drained of emotion, too tired to think about the future.

I spent most of my free thought imagining how I could have changed the outcome, or fantasizing about patricide. Maybe if I had forced myself on Gloria the way he wanted, she'd still be alive. Maybe he'd have let me have her if I pretended to go along. Maybe if I had thought to bring Rachel's gun when I suspected the Fae were involved, he'd have been the one to leave that room in a bodybag.

The one thing I had done right was to go alone. His goal had been to bring the people I loved within his reach. I would have given him anything had he succeeded.

For the next few days, the four of us couldn't be separated except during shower and bathroom breaks, and we accomplished little other than completing the first season of Bay City Bae. I found myself grateful for the campy unreality of it, and as horrible as it was, it produced some of the first smiles in Meridian since Sunday evening. In the finale, everyone broke up, and Melissa and Lavonda were written out of the show.

The actress playing Melissa had talent, at least compared with the rest of the cast, so it wasn't a surprise that she bailed on her contract, and Lavonda had been nothing but a failed attempt at social pandering from the start, which didn't sit well with any of the show's fans.

Katherine read aloud an interview with the director that covered his plans for making a group of affluent white kids seem culturally inclusive. A new Chinese cast member, lamentably named Long Wang, was to be introduced into season two. When called out for it, the director insisted it had been chosen for its meaning in Mandarin—King Dragon. He also promised a pair of blond and buxom Sámi twins representing the indigenous people of Sweden. In a shocking plot twist, a professional surfer, his hot girlfriend, and her hot sister would move into the beach house next to Marco's, ensuring everyone that the show's quality wouldn't suffer from improvement.

As tempting as it would have been to quietly disappear into the safety and comfort of Meridian, the courts still hunted us, and my father had made a promise to ruin my world, our world, if I didn't join him. Every idle moment worked in their favor.