Pursuing Our Freedom| ✓

Kabanata 29

Kabanata 29

I found it funny before, that people from the books find it hard to confess to their beloved. Bakit sila nahihirapan? All they have to say is what they feel...

Pero iba pala kapag ikaw na mismo ang nasa sitwasyon nila. Napapatda ka sa iyong pwesto, hinihila palagi ang iyong dila at halos kahit titigan mo lang nang matagal ay parang bawal na.

Because you'll want more. You'll crave for more. Pero hanggang doon na lang 'yon. Unlike how it is portrayed in the books, it's not easy to dictate how a person feels about you. It is not easy to confess, to open your heart out - because they might break it and broken things cannot always be mended.

"Iinom ba si Philo?" tanong ni Naiara kay Iscalade. Lumingon naman sa akin si Iscalade at bahagyang nagtaas ng kilay.

"Gusto mo, Philo? Mag-try?"

"Hindi na po," I rejected their offer. I actually don't drink. Hindi ko pa nararanasan at hindi ko rin naman gusto. The smell of it is already making me cringe. Masyadong matapang.

"Nai, bantayan mo. Okay lang?" bilin ni Iscalade kay Naiara, at agad naman itong tumango. They were close to each other. At para bang kilala na nila ang isa't isa noon pa man.

"May pupuntahan ka?"

"Balcony lang ako sandali," tinuro ni Iscalade ang itaas na palapag kung nasaan ang ilan sa mga varsity players ng aming school.

Nagbigay nang tipid na ngiti si Iscalade bago lumisan. I could feel my cheeks burning, madalas na akong maapektuhan kahit sa simpling galaw niya lang. It's not fair how his effect only works on me. Crush din naman siya ni Naiara pero kalmado lang ito at nagagawa pang makipagbiruan sa kanya.

Tanaw pa rin naman namin si Iscalade mula sa aming pwesto. He was laughing with the varsity players, may pinaguusapan siguro sila. Naiara hang her arms around me, putting her face near mine.

Ang ganda niya. Her face makes her look strong, matangos na ilong at mapupusok na mga mata. Every guy would once in a while look at her. She isn't the type of girl that will caught your attention in a flash, pero mananatili ang tingin mo sa kanya habang nasa loob siya ng kwarto. She had similar vibes with Iscalade. The 'Life of the party' people.

"Wala ka ba talagang gusto kay Iscalade?" she asked and I immediately became flustered.

"W-wala po..." I lied, lowering down my gaze.

"I like him," matapat niyang saad. "And I tend to pursue what I like. Pero syempre, kung may namamagitan sa inyo..."

Napalingon ako sa kanya at nakita na binigyan niya ako ng isang ngiti. A genuine smile smeared on her face.

"I'll back off. I respect boundaries..." she pinched my cheeks, pinangigilan niya ito bago bitawan. It didn't hurt though.

"Wala naman p-pong namamagitan sa amin." I replied, trying to calm myself from trembling. Bakit ba ako kinakabahan? It's not like she's interrogating me!

"Are you sure?" she sounded hopeful, nawala ang pagiging matapang sa kanyang itsura. She looked hesitant. "Pero kung napipilitan ka lang-"

"Its okay lang po..." I breathed out, feebly. Pinapakalma ang sistema dahil natatakot ako na baka makita niyang hindi ito totoo.

Who am I to tell her to stop her feelings when I'm not even sure that I can pursue Iscalade?

"Philo, thank you..." her eyes glowed with happiness. Nagulat ako sa biglang pagyakap niya sa akin. Her arms around my waist tightened, I can feel her joy.

"I was always hesitating to tell him. Pakiramdam ko kasi instant reject agad, baka kasi hulog na sa'yo. And I respect you, you're such a sweet girl. Even Kile says that Iscalade might have feelings for you..."