MY RUDE HUSBAND (complete)

Thirty-three

well what can I say? I'm happy and I can’t ask for anything more, well except that today is the 31st and my plan to leave is weighing me down a lot, Carl has been such a darling that he makes things hard, he makes leaving him hard, a part of me thinks maybe he know and he's doing this on purpose but why does a part of me want that to be true so much? 

Anyway .... after Fiji we went to Rome then Mexico, gosh how great was that, I even snapped a few pictures just for memory, throughout he was either holding my hand or touching my back, either way he always had his hand on me and I wasn't complaining...

Right now we on the rooftop of a hotel, safely booked for only us can you imagine, sipping some wine, before that we were playing a know-me game, I didn't know he also paints, remember I once saw some paintings? Well those belong to him but he says he stopped, he plays basketball and obviously very fond of his niece and nephew...big news!!! Angel and cavin are an item, have a kid together, I didn't know that, but anyway I learnt a thing or two about him, he was still too reserved to talk about Mirabelle of which I kind of understand because I too don't talk about my past that much, he asked about my scars and I told him I don't want to talk about it, I felt the way his demeanor changed but nonetheless he let it slide , I didn't share much about me I mean why because day after tomorrow I'm leaving him*sigh* why does this topic sound do heavy?

Right now I have my back on his chest and my head on his shoulder my eyes closed and his playing with my fingers, gosh this is heavenly...I don't know what time it is but we just waiting for it to strike midnight...so we can see the fireworks...crazy, in fact it's a cliché to tell the truth...I'm seeing the fire cracks with for the first and last time, spending last day of the year only to leave the beginning of another year.

He released a sigh and said:" stay"

okay...I'm thinking and imagining too much, I should stop all this.

 “did you hear me?”

“I’m not sure I did...I tend to imagine a lot"

I felt his chest vibrating meaning that he's laughing at me, then he stopped.

 “I mean it...I want you to give us a chance "

 “what are you talking about" My heart was beating fast; he seriously can't be saying what I think he's saying.

He releases a very deep sigh and turned me so I look at him

“uuhmmm...okay...*he rubs his face*so I heard you that day "

My body tensed, no, no, no, no please lord don’t do this to me now, please.

“Bella look, I know I haven’t been the best but please stay, just*sigh* give me a chance, give us to explore this”

He can’t say that, he shouldn’t be saying those things, he’s making things difficult. I stood up not wanting to hear anymore. He can’t want that from me.

“yes Bella I want that from you. please” he stood up too. “look, fuck this is hard, I, I…look, Isabella, I want to explore us okay? if you don’t want to fine then but please not before we try at least”

He kept rubbing his face, with a look I have never seen on him before.

“carl…I’m sorry, but please”

“no please baby, please I’m begging here, I have been an arse towards you but please give me a chance please”

He called me baby again, tears were burning my eyes but I can’t, we! We can’t I know it. I should probably just go…yes. I’m leaving now, right this minute.