Sanctuary

Comfortable Silences, Warm Embraces

Here I was back in his arms, shivering and shaking as the fear of abyss consumed me. I held onto him like he was my last string of sanity. He didn't ask nor did he resist. He held me just as I held him, though his actions didn't radiate fear like mine; instead they radiated the warmth of worry. It was his very warmth that was pulling me out of the cold abyss I had once again fallen into courtesy to the house I had just been to. 

Stuck in the maze of my thoughts; I had not realized that Yoongi had carried me to his bedroom. Slowly climbing the rope of sanity and sobriety I started gaining conscious of my surroundings. I looked up into Yoongi's eyes that were drowning in concern and worry. He slowly observed my features, and every muscle of his body tensed around me. It was almost as if he thought his eyes were deceiving him, because he wasn't getting that feeling of familiarity that he so often experienced. The purple and red marks on my face were enough to hide my warm and soft features with a mask of pain. The very pain that Yoongi was feeling while looking at them. 

The streams of tears that had dried out were now once again rushing down my face. It was those tears that snapped Yoongi out of his trance. He put his warm hand on my cheek with utmost care and wiped off the tears that filled my eyes and well my face. Unable to utter a word or even react, I just sniffled staring into his eyes as if telling a story just by my pupils. It didn't surprise me however, that Yoongi heard my story loud and clear. Yoongi slid his arms beneath me and swooped me up as I held onto him. 

With slow and steady steps he carried me to the bathroom. His light was the only thing that was helping me progress out of this never ending abyss. After gently setting me down on the counter, he reached out to the shelf and grabbed a first aid kit. Starting at the wounds on my face he slowly began to clean each wound. As Yoongi applied ointment to each wound with utmost care I found myself in a sanctuary, a safe place. His warmth had become walls of a fort protecting me from the cold outside. 

As Yoongi finished cleaning the wounds on my face his eyes met mine. I knew he was wondering about the wounds that filled my body. A bit flustered I took off my shirt to reveal all my bruises. Insecurity took over my body as Yoongi looked at the purple marks on my body. I could see his eyes darken as his eyes observed every inch. Unable to meet his eyes I looked down, fidgeting with my hands. Yoongi took a deep breath and continued the process of patching me up. It wasn't the first time he had taken care of me, but it sure was the first time he had seen the wounds and scars on my body. The very body I had tried to hide in fear of abandonment was here before him, but he wasn't running from it. Instead he chose to patch it up. 

Neither of us had spoken a word since I had entered the house. I could tell he was dying to know what happened but his curiosity had no victory over his patience. In the comfortable silence he finished treating my wounds. Without doing anything else he cleaned up and handed me a his clothes. It was as though he had read my train of thoughts, because all I wanted right now was to be surrounded by him. His scent, his warmth, his protection. I desperately needed it. He turned his back to me allowing me to change. I could tell he didn't wish to leave me alone at the moment. I struggled to stand and put the shirt over my head due to the weakness that took over me. Once again I found Yoongi to my rescue. 

He then carried me to the kitchen with him, not wanting to part for even a second. He set me down on the counter and began cooking what seemed like cheese pasta, my favorite comfort food. While observing him I gathered the courage to let it all out, 

"My mother took me away but I escaped somehow" I stuttered, tearing up once again as the memories flooded my mind 

Yoongi stopped what he was doing and looked at me, "I figured, and I am so proud of you for being so strong. For being here. You've done so good and you've won. You won bubba, you won this war against you fear." he spoke in his voice that I was dying to hear. His words warmed up my heart. The hollow that I had been feeling there since I was taken back to my mother was gone, and I knew that only he had the power to do that.