Bad Boy's Shy Girl (New Version)

[ 48 ] - Dream A Little Dream Of Me

Noah had always hated being alone as a child.

    He was what you would call a 'scaredy-cat' to the highest degree during his time of youth. Thankfully, he always had his loving parents and dependable older brothers to help with that, to allow him to forget that isolating, painful feeling of being completely and utterly alone.

Yet ever since the passing of his mother he learned that anybody was capable of leaving, whether it be by choice or force. With his father mentally and emotionally unavailable to keep Noah stable and feeling safe, he had desperately clung onto his older brothers for that distant feeling of home. And when they inevitably disappeared too, Noah couldn't help but wonder if this was how he was meant to live: abandoned by everyone he cared for.

   Many times as a child he tried to make friends with the kids at school, trying and pitifully failing to find somewhere he belonged. To find someone who wouldn't leave him.

    He never did.

    When his father finally came around, Noah had deserted that safe and warm feeling of home in order to keep himself sane; he knew the pain his father went through- was still going through- when his wife passed and didn't dare put any blame on him for forcing maturity and responsibility on his last son, but it was difficult to laugh and be carefree with the man who wasn't there when he needed him most. Noah was left alone. Left to suffer in silence the entirety of his childhood.

   It had taken time- and a lot of it- for the two Grey men to finally let go and find that safe and warm feeling again.

    But it was Jamie- kind, quiet, beautiful Jamie who had allowed him to finally breathe that sweet air of peace.

   In the beginning, just seeing her nervous flickering eyes and the timid expression on her face whenever they were together gave him a chance to breathe. Surely he never expressed it, the serenity he felt with her during this time because he himself didn't know what was happening. He should've been tense and insecure with the amount of times the girl would literally curl within herself when they were together, he should've felt insulted that she was too scared to properly meet his eyes when foolishly stumbling over her own words and should've been concerned with her body's blood circulation with the amount of times her face would redden after any little interaction- but that just wasn't the case.

    Jamie, to him, was the sun beaming brightly through the endless clouds, saving him from his own destruction and internal pain before he even knew it. And he had no clue as to why.

  He figured it was maybe because of her social rank in school, of being 'invisible' with absolutely no demeaning or hurtful feelings toward the expression. Of course he knew of her family and their popularity within the small suburban area they lived in, but she was never one for the spotlight. It wasn't so hard to learn that she was very much different than her very social family members, despite him never (socially) knowing of her father, but the rest of her family who were very social, prone to always being- in their own ways- loud and very much in the public eye. Jamie was different in this sense, never doing anything that would cause her attention, always staying within her bubble of comfort and never trying to step outside it's borders. She was in all aspects, invisible, someone with no need or care to try and make herself known in the world.

   She was just... living.

   Every day living in ways that made her feel comfortable and safe within her own bubble.

   And he admired that about her.

   The nights he spent away from home, engaging in the life that would usually harden his delicate heart, he would remind himself of Jamie- of the freedom and the warm sense of peace he felt when being with her. She was as fragile and innocent as that of a newborn fawn- or maybe a lamb. At his grandparents' farm they had lambs and he always loved spending time with them. She was the calm after the hurricane on the most chaotic of days, displaying her generosity and kindness to him on the worst of them and giving him the clarity to go through it all with no negative feelings.