larry stylinson oneshots

just two laddy lads

Louis: "Hello!"

Harry: (caught off guard) "Wait- I was supposed to--"

L: (ignoring Harry) "Welcome back to whatever the hell this podcast is!"

H: (trying to get himself together) "For the love of- I'm Harry."

L: "And I'm Louis!"

H: "I guess we're just jumping into this. I don't think we have a proper introduction."

L: "Who needs proper introductions when spontaneity exists?"

H: (teasing) "I didn't know you knew words like spontaneity."

L: "Shut up."

H: "So, we've got a whole mess of things to talk about today. I think the first is- what does this say? Your handwriting is so shi--"

L: (somewhat offended) "Oi!"

H: "For those of you who don't know, I don't actually have notes. It's just Louis' questionable handwriting in the photos he sends me."

L: (no longer offended) "Hey, speaking of, did you see the photo I sent you?"

H: "Of what?"

L: "I'll send it again."

H: "Oh, that's so concerning. Should I be worri--"

L: (cutting Harry off) "It's Rudolph."

H: (looking at the photo Louis sent him of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. It's drawn over some ukulele chords) "That's a nice drawing."

L: "Thank you. Rudolph thanks you."

H: (trying to move on) "Cool, so,--"

L: (with deafening amounts of volume) "THEN ONE FOGGY CHRISTMAS EVE."

H: (wincing) "My God, please calm down."

L: (calmly) "I'm considering a career in the arts."

H: "Louis Van Gogh."

L: "Yes, that's my new name. I'll be in contact."

H: "With who?"

L: (as the first one to succeed in moving on) "So! Our first order of business is actually something that I saw the other day."

H: "Oh boy."

L: "It's them reversible octopus things."

H: "Oh! I think they're cute."

L: (seriously) "Okay, but what's the logic? It's fine for an octopus, right, but if you do it to a person, then all of a sudden, it's a crime."

H: (appalled, choking) "Louis!"

L: "It's true!"

H: "I inhaled so hard that I choked."

L: "On a d- so--"

H: (in disbelief) "Louis- why?"

L: (through laughter) "I don't know!"

H: "Why would you do this?"

L: "I'm sorry!"

H: (with a smile) "I hate you so much."