ᴀʙᴅɪᴛᴏʀʏ || baek kyung

I am an Emotional Trainwreck Who Thrives in Chaos

I am an Emotional Trainwreck Who Thrives in Chaos

"So, how do you feel?"

Jia and Dohwa were sprawled on the grass, on one of the lesser frequented lawns of their school. Dohwa's violin lay between them, as he had just finished his morning practise.

"Dead on the inside." Jia replied, hands resting on her stomach and eyes closed, "Dead on the outside." She turned her head to look at him, "I haven't seen him since he left at the beginning of summer vacation. Not so much as a text. And I have too much self respect to make the first move. He quit his job as well so..." She made a vague gesture.

Dohwa hummed, "Are you excited to see him today?"

"I'd rather set myself on fire." She answered honestly, "I don't think I've told the girls about this either. I might have, I don't know. The summer vacation was a blur. I remember something about Aeil's stepmother shaving off her eyebrows—and by her, I mean Aeil's—so she didn't leave her house until they grew back. Soohyang came to visit a couple of times, though. She was worried I was living off Geumbi's food because I didn't buy any groceries. Oh, and Geumbi threw up once. That's the most adventurous thing that happened this summer."

"Besides your breakup?" He asked, raising a palm to shield himself from the sunlight falling on his face.

She fixed her glasses on her nose, "I don't even know if it classifies as a breakup. What did you do during the vacations?"

"Oh, you know." Dohwa waved his hand, "This and that." At the exasperated look Jia shot him, he hesitantly admitted, "We met up a couple of times, the three of us. He seems...more mopey than usual—whoa, that's the curliest hair I've ever seen in my life."

She stood up, rolling her eyes at his absolutely surprised face. Her hair had grown, and if it were straight—which it wasn't—it probably would've been past her shoulders. Instead, Jia had bunched it all up in a bushy ponytail that stuck out like the tail of a fish on the back of her head.

"It's like I'm looking at a stranger," Dohwa mused loudly as she dusted her skirt and readjusted her glasses. "Also, you have grass in your hair."

Shrugging, Jia said, "I didn't have it in me to get up and wear my lenses and straighten my hair. Who cares about what others think, right?"

"Sure, I—where are you going? Class is other way." He frowned, watching her sling her bag over her shoulder and leave.

She turned a little with an annoyed look, "I want to eat because I'm bored, Dohwa. Leave me alone."

☘☘☘

Obviously the summer vacations hadn't passed by in a fucking blur. They passed by at a torturously slow speed, making sure Jia felt the agony of being alone every fucking second.

Her siblings could barely do anything and Jia didn't want to seem inconsiderate by demanding attention, what with Sena's wedding inching closer.

She kept to herself, and spent as much time as she could with Geumbi, convincing herself that soon she'd forget that someone other than Geumbi would be waiting for her back home. The salt and sugar would be back in their place, and not on the highest shelf. Nobody would click their tongue and try to trip her when she skated across the wooden floor while wearing socks. There would be no empty tea cups to put away or extra dishes to wash. No shirts and tshirts and pullovers hanging by the dozen on the hooks behind the bathroom door. There would be peace and quiet in the apartment with no one to fill the silence with noir films and R&B music.