Broken hearts, Always get fixed.

Chapter 54: Are we fine?

TW: Very possible abuse. 

It's not always easy speaking your mind, sometimes you need to be forced to do it. sometimes, it's just better to keep things to yourself, play dumb, even when your whole body aches to come clean. so you shut your mouth, keep your secret and find other ways to distract yourself. 

The human body never lies.. of course playing a fake doctor Ellen knows this, so why she chose to lie, who knows. 

--- 

"Hey." 

"Hi." He replied back a little drowsy from the morphine. 

"How did you do in there?" she said trying to mess with his head. 

"What I always do." 

"hm?"

"What?" he asked. 

"Nothing." 

"ellen." 

"Fine- just you know you were bombed and you weren't the one fake operating." 

"Fake operating? I'm a real doctor, i'm a real neurosurgeon and my boss is Krista Vernoff." 

At this point her lip was trembling and her stomach was aching to let out a laugh that she has been holding in. She went to talk but the only thing that came out was a laugh. 

"I'm sorry.. i'm sorry." She laughed while she said it. 

"Oh, i'm funny. i'm funny and sexy." he smirked, which only made her laugh harder. 

"Ok, i'm done, i'm sorry." 

He looked at her dead in the eyes and patted the spot next to him giving her permission to lay next to him. She crawled into the hospital bed next to him and laid on his chest hearing his heartbeat. 

But of course, not all good things last forever.  

--- 

"You can't just leave!" she shouted at him. 

"Ellen- This is racing, my hobby outside of my life! Outside of our life." He stopped himself as he realized what had just come out of his mouth. 

"Oh.. wow.. okay then." she could feel the tear welling up in eyes. 

"I didn't mean it like that-," 

"Oh you didn't mean it as getting away from our life together, getting away from me? I'm just hearing things." she scoffed to herself but Patrick heard. 

"What that's it your just gonna walk away!?" he grabbed her forearm. 

"Let go your hurting me!" 

His mind was fuzzy, full of rage but when he heard those words it immediately fell apart and he let go. 

"Im sorry-,"

"Yeah me too..." She sighed. 

"We can't keep doing this- the fighting.." she said walking towards their bathroom. Memories flooded her mind of Chris when he was here, which lead to more memories, which eventually came all back to one memory she hasn't told anybody not even Patrick. She was flinched when she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her from the back. 

"Ell-," he looked at her face which was flushed "are- are you afraid of me?" 

"I-Uh. no. no. god no, just.. you doing that," she looked down at her wrists which were now a little red "brought back memories of Chris.." she sighed. 

"Oh ell... I'm sorry I didn't mean- You know I would never hurt you right?" he said while bringing into a hug. She mumbled something inaudible into his neck, they stayed that way for a few minutes before eventually pulling away. 

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. knowing he had to go because he already promised, but he couldn't just leave her in such a fragile state. It has been a few weeks since the bombing at the restaurant, just a few weeks. He thought about it all. 

He thought about how terrible Ellen must have felt, she witnessed all these people die around her, me almost die in her lap, she witnessed and heard Isiah say his last word and take his last breath, she was hurt herself. she had gone through double what everyone else had gone through.. and he wanted to live her alone. 

"I'm sorry." he blurted. She looked up at him with red, puffy eyes "For?" 

"For everything," he sighed "I wanted to leave when.. it's been three weeks since the bombing, you were- you were so strong that day, you witnessed so much.. and I haven't been exactly easy on you either.. I'm just. i'm sorry. I'm going to cancel my plans with racing, you and I are going to snuggle and watch movies and eat everything until are stomachs hurt." He chuckled at his words. man has he gone soft. 

"Yeah.. I did witness a lot. I thought I watched you take your last breath. I seen Isiah- him.. he.. said to tell you that," her voice breaking slowly "You were a good man." 

"He was too."

"You know.. when I pulled you away from the bomb.. I thought.." she shook her head "Nevermind.." 

Patrick's mind over came with a memory he didn't know existed. 

"Patrick!" he heard Ellen scream. He felt her hands grab his forearms and pull him away. he remembered hitting my head on the table and Ellen's presence gone. he looked around and saw her where he was sitting and the bomb going directly her in her direction, he wanted to scream but before he got the chance the world went black. 

"Oh my god.." He muttered.

"What? are you ok?" Ellen got up from the bed and made her way over to him. 

"You... You pulled me out of the way and took my place, you- you were willing to end your life for mine." 

She winced as the memory came back "I did.." he looked her in the eyes "Yeah.. you did." 

A/N: Ok so, I posted two chapters, um, this was written at midnight and I was extremely tired so if nothing makes sense, that is why. ok well i'm going to bed now. Everyone have a good night! If it's still night for you, if not then have a good morning. ok bye now.