ALIVE ༄ SUNA RINTAROU

14. no words

Y/N's POV

"you should leave," i say quietly. suna's smirk falters.

"i can't just leave you here alone," he gestures around the park. "come on." there's a hint of softness in his voice, but i shake my head and look away from him. if what i think just happened happened, i didn't want to talk to anyone— especially suna or atsumu. hell, even osamu if he knew.

instead of talking to him, i pull out my phone and call my mom's number. he watches me.

after a few rings, she picks up.

"y/n?"

"hey mom. if i send you my location right now, do you think you can pick me up?" i ask, sounding like a kid whose playdate just finished early.

"uh..." she trails off, and there's some muffled sounds on the other end. "sure! are you okay? you're not hurt, are you?"

"no, i'm fine. i'll see you soon then, thanks."

"mhm, see you hon," she ends the call and after i send my location, i put my phone away.

"my mom's coming," i tell suna. "so you can leave now."

suna cocks his head. "don't be ridiculous, y/n."

me, ridiculous? i could shout a bunch of profanities at him at this very moment for his ridiculousness. the fact that he and atsumu had a little bet on whether or not he could steal a kiss from me, or do whatever with me was ridiculous. the fact that atsumu decided this would be funny.

"was- is this all a joke to you, suna?" i ask, tension straining my voice. i could feel my throat closing up and the tears threaten my sinuses. it was taking a whole lot of strength to keep it together.

suna doesn't answer, so i continue.

"how could you do something like that? seriously, that's one hell of a skill you have for acting. might as well become a hollywood star at this point," my words come out quicker and harsher. he still doesn't say a word. "why?" and there it is. my voice breaks, and suddenly the tears being to prick my waterline.

suna's stopped smiling. he's stopped smirking. he looks rather concerned, but i wouldn't put it past him as another act.

as he sits back down on the bench and tries to comfort me, i pull away and stand up. feeling his touch felt like knives at my skin. it felt like he could cut me up into pieces and throw me away in a trashbag.

"y/n," he says softly. that deceiving softness.

"answer my question," i say, choking on my tears. looks like there's no point in hiding them anymore. "who started that wager? why do it?"

"let me take you home, i'll tell you in the car," suna offers.

"like how we were just gonna go on a little drive and have a little talk, right?" this wasn't worth the anger or pain. he was not worth this. i just wish my mom would come quicker so that i could leave.

"y/n-,"

"can't you answer my questions?!" i interrupt, frustrated. "stop saying my name so casually, just stop." he stops talking, but doesn't stop watching me with careful eyes, as if i was going to stab him here and now.

my phone buzzes and i pull it out of my pocket to avert my eyes from suna's. it's a text notification from atsumu. perfect timing. feeling the urge to throw my phone, i turn it off and grip it tight.

as if i had conjured some bad luck, my phone buzzes again. however, it doesn't stop. it's a phone call. i turn it around in my palm to see who it was and pick up when i do.

"are you here?" i ask, turning around to look for my mom's car. she isn't in the parking lot.

"sorry y/n, i thought i'd be able to but it seems like i'm being held back..." she trails off, and again, there's audible voices in the back. "are you able to get a ride from someone else? maybe take the bus?"

i hold in my sigh and pat my pockets. "i left my wallet at home, but i'll find someone," i say in a flat tone, trying to convey as much annoyance as i could.

"okay, i'm sorry again hon," she replies, though her tone not sounding too sincere. i make a hum of acknowledgment and end the call. who else could i contact? kara? no, i did not want to talk to her right now either.

why was i so friendless?

i could call my dad, but he's most likely at work. perhaps walking wouldn't be too bad. maybe i could hitchike too.

"y/n," suna says my name once again. i ignore him and follow my train of thoughts, walking away. i didn't know if i was going in the right direction, but i'm sure i'd be fine. "y/n!" suna calls again as i get farther away.

he hustles after me and stops in front of my path.

"will you stop being so stubborn? let me take you home," he says, sounding annoyed this time. i step to the side to try and go around him, but he follows my movement. "y/n, seriously."

my fists clench and unclench to release the tension. his face looked so punchable right now.

"fine, but say a word to me and i will open the car door midway through the drive." i state, turning around and finally taking suna's offer. he doesn't say anything and follows behind me at a safe distance. when i reach the car first, i hear it unlock and get in the back seat. it was better than sitting next to him.

as he gets into the car, i hear him mumble something. i shoot daggers into his back with my eyes, feeling all the fury building up. suna only turns to look out the back window as he reverses, but he steals a glance at me. then, we're on our 'merry' way back to my place.

//

the drop off was quick. i left his car as soon as it pulled to a stop in my driveway, not letting him have a chance to say a thing. he waited until i went inside before leaving, like he had the first time he dropped me off.

when i entered my house, a wave of restlessness came over me. my knees felt weak and my eyes were teary. i wanted to scream, but my body wouldn't let me make a noise. it was so stupid to get caught up on something like a kiss, but the plotting that had to happen behind the scene. the manipulation. that hurt.

i decide to take a shower to cool off. i felt gross. today felt gross.

everything just felt so out of place now.

//

author's note

this chapter was short and sweet... right ? hahaha <3

sorry it felt so repetitive, it's just y/n was kinda in a state of shock, ya know? so her head wasn't on straight atm.

anyways, sorry this chapter is so short actually, but i got stuff comin! my graduation is in a week, so the next update might be a bit unless i finish my finals early.

thank u for all the continued support!!
- m