Chapter 21

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Tiara was almost twelve weeks pregnant when she went to visit her first OBGYN clinic. She was nine weeks when she found out, and not knowing how to handle the situation, waited a week after her revelation to tell Daniel. A part of her felt like letting Chris know was the right thing to do, but another part of her felt like it would just mess everything up; even worst than it already was. She prayed every day that this would all play out and be over after she'd have the baby. But she also knew that that's when every thing would come crashing down. A decision had to be made, and it had to be made quick.

She laid on top of the exam bed with her fingers interlocked above her stomach. Her eyes stayed on the ceiling. They studied the small, dark specks scattered around the rectangular lights.

Growing up, she always thought having a baby was going to be this spectacular experience. That she'd be more than excited to start a family of her own with the person she loved. But how could that be when the person she loved might not even be the father of her child. She exhaled deeply as her eyes traveled down and to the wall in front of her. She had to let it out. Everything. All the secrets, the lies. And hopefully when everything was out on the table, she could focus on this beautiful gift and figure out how she could give this baby all he or she deserved: a bright future, a safe enviroment, and most importantly, a good father. It's just that the question was, who is the father?

A female doctor came in the room only a few minutes later. The first thing she did was greet her patient, then introduce herself as Dr. May. She was a short, Asain lady who looked about thirty. But maybe that was just do to the fact that Asians never age until the last minute. She was looking down at a clear-colored clipboard as she walked through the door, and Tiara could tell by the look on her face after she looked up then looked backed down, that she was being judged. To the doctor, she was just another young, black woman who ended up getting pregnant by a no good man. The truth was, Daniel had begged Tiara to let him come. But she insisted otherwise. He had an important test to take in one of his classes, and even though that was a good excuse in itself, it wasn't the only excuse. She just couldn't stand to see the man she was engaged to fall in love with the sonogram of a baby that may not even be his. After minutes of pleading and Tiara giving him every excuse in the book not to come, he was finally convinced. But he swore he'd be at the next one.

After the doctor had finished asking what felt like to Tiara, a thousand questions, she pulled a chair from the corner of the room and rolled it over so it was facing the exam bed. She sat down in it with her clipboard between her torso and forearm, and snapped a pair of blue gloves over her hands. Tiara moved her hands to her sides as the doctor placed a white blanket-like cloth underneath her belly. "Now you may already be aware of this but what we're about to do is called an ultrasound scan," the doctor explaind. She squeezed the ultrasound gel unto the transducer, then slowly rolled it unto the surface of Tiara's belly. After a few moments of rolling the transducer around, the doctor finally smiled and said, "There is it."

Tiara's gaze quickly shot up to the monitor on the wall in front of her. After Tiara laid there quietly, squinting at the screen, Dr. May knowingly added, "You see right there, near the far left." Tiara directed her eyes over to where the doctor was referencing. "That's the head." She could see it now. The little round shaped was sitting against what looked like a wall. "And if you look further down, you can see it's hearbeat." And for a quick minute, Tiara felt that joy she had been looking for. She stared at the monitor as her mouth grew into a big smile, and her mouth slowly dropped in awe. She was having a baby! There was an actual, living being inside of her!

"It looks like you're about three months pregnant," Dr. May revealed from in front of her computer. This simple sentence brought Tiara's situation back to the light, and her smile instantly disappeared. She was hoping the amount of weeks she had been pregnant would bring her a little closer to finding out who the daddy was. But unfortuanetly, it didn't. She had slept with Daniel for the first time only a week after her and Chris hooked up. And this just meant she was back at square one.

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