Love & Ruins (#2)

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Chapter Thirty-Eight: Evan

I didn't get any sleep last night.

When I tried to close my eyes, ease my nerves and tell myself I'll deal with the situation tomorrow, I'd just end up wide awake, heart strumming, and hands sweaty.

I couldn't disregard the shocking turn of events, specifically Maggie pouring her heart out to me and confirming our situation's state; that neither of us actually moved on. In retrospect, it's not hard to imagine - although what we had was short-lived, it stuck with us in ways that forgetting the other person was simply not an option.

But I didn't want to set myself up for failure. The first time I saw her again after what happened in LA, she was with Levi and she appeared happy, even when looks did wound up being deceiving, you can't blame me if I took the situation at face value.

That's why when she told me in a pit of despair that she still loves me, it was cathartic because the feeling is more than mutual.

It wasn't until reality sunk in that I realized the implications of her confession, and why she was even taken away from me, in the first place. It was like being granted a gift only to have it snatched from you.

Now, it's just a matter of staying true to what she said, sober this time.

I emerged from the couch considering I let Maggie sleep in my room, thinking I'll just prepare breakfast as my attempts at resting proved to be futile.

But as I hovered by the stove preparing breakfast, I couldn't help glancing at the bedroom door now and then, impatient to see if she was awake or not. I couldn't help it, I was desperate beyond belief. In my head, I was practicing what I'm going to say to her.

Calm down, she isn't even awake yet. Wait until she's up and moving, she drank so much last night she'll probably end up walking like a corpse.

I sighed, thinking it'd be right that I give her time to sober up before talking to her about-

I almost dropped the plates I was carrying to the dining table once I heard the sound of my bedroom door open, as I stood upright to the sight of Maggie walking out.

Her hair was disheveled and she looked exhausted, "What the fuck?" she grunted, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

I cleared my throat "Good morning, is your head hurting?"

"Hurting would be an understatement if I'll be honest with you," her voice was raspy as she answered, "Too many sensations at once, I'm surprised I'm alive right now."

A chuckle slipped past my lips "Harsh but I have to agree, you drank so much last night. Too much actually." I deliberated on what I'm about to say next "It got pretty wild."

Her eyebrows shot up to her forehead. "How so?"

I swallowed harshly, she doesn't remember? Maybe she needs to collect her bearings "Don't worry, it's not anything to worry about, but it is concerning. How about you eat first and drink some medicine, and after you're done we can discuss what happened, hm?"

She looked dubious and I can understand why - I was dragging things on. But it's needed, I don't want to overwhelm her, it's nine in the morning, for crying out loud.

As she ate I fetched her some medicine to mitigate her headache, she said it hurt, but not anything she can't endure. As I rummaged through my medicine cabinet, I couldn't help it as my mind ran wild with all the ways I'm going to approach the topic at hand. How do you even have that kind of conversation?