Tempted | Kai Parker

sixty one: colin

"Come to the hospital."

That's all Caroline had said. No information, no details, no reason. Just 'come to the hospital.'

As soon as we had got the call, Kai and I rushed out of the apartment, forgetting completely about anything that had happened the day before. The only thing that was on either of our minds was Caroline and Liz.

Kai had insisted on driving, and I wasn't in much of a state to argue. My hands were trembling, and I couldn't seem to stop fidgeting for more than a few seconds. To be honest though, Kai didn't look too calm himself. His grip on the steering wheel was so tight that it was causing the muscles in his arm to strain, and his driving was far from cautious.

But still, I couldn't focus on the sickening blur of buildings whizzing past us, or the fact Kai was going almost double the speed limit. I just got lost in an ever-darkening sea of my own thoughts, and I couldn't escape it. Once I dipped a toe into those vicious waters, I was consumed. The raging torrents of my own mind swept me up, devouring me in their vicious cyclone.

By the time we were pulling into the hospital car park I was completely convinced that the worst possible eventualities I could conjure were about to become depressing realities.

There was one thing which I'd never been able to escape my whole life. Death. Sure, I was immortal, but what kind of life is watching everyone you love die? Starting with my mother, and then followed by who knows how many others, including my father. I just begged the universe not to let Liz be the next one to go. Caroline needed her mom. I needed Caroline to be okay.

Every inch we closed in on the hospital made me more and more nauseous. My chest felt like it was about to collapse under immense pressure, and every pulse of my heart seemed to draw my rib cage a little closer to my lungs. The heavier the thump of my heart, the tighter my ribs got, the less I could breathe. I felt like I wasn't getting a hold of any oxygen anymore. Alarm bells were ringing in my brain, my toes and fingers were starting to numb, and my head was spinning, but I still couldn't manage that breath.

And there was no one to help me. No one to save me. I needed to be the one supporting others, I couldn't afford to have my own problems. And I'd save them all before I even considered tending to my own worries.

Be strong for Kai. Be strong for Caroline. Suck it up.

Just breathe.

The oxygen burned my airway on the way down, but just one deep breath released a little bit of pressure. My rib cage expanded. The dots in my eyes faded. I was going to be fine.

I had to be fine.

Kai was right by my side as we charged through the bleak hospital hallways. Each one looked the same as the last, and I began to feel like I was trapped in some horrifying maze. I could hear whimpers, and groans through the walls. Death was surrounding me, and the horrifying echoes of patients cries from all around the hospital were invading my ears, penetrating my mind, and nestling in with all the memories which I tried my best to forget.

But I never forgot things like this. I remembered them late at night when the world was still. I'd hear the last breaths of someone I never even knew for years to come.

I grabbed onto Kai's hand as we turned the corner into the final hallway before we would reach the room we were instructed to go to, trying to focus on the feeling of his skin above anything else. But I couldn't seem to stop the invasive thoughts today. Please be good news, I begged. Or at least don't be awful news, I settled.

I desperately wanted, or perhaps even needed a pause to get a breath into my lungs before I entered the room, but I quickly scolded myself for even having that idea. Don't be selfish, get there as quick as you can. I could properly calm down later. For now, concealing my trepidation would have to suffice. No one could seem to tell the difference anyway.