LOVING A SEMINARIAN

CHAPTER XIX LOVE

JOYCE

Love is the most wonderful feeling in the world. It makes the world go round. It makes the life worthwhile.

Yes. I could say its true.

I feel like I'm riding on a clouds singing my favorite song while he's there listening to me. Its like a dream...a very beautiful dream.

Yon pala yon. Yong pinili mo ang bagay na alam mong gusto mo. Yong magpapasaya sayo. I feel free. I feel I am who I am.

"I thought you're just going to drive me home?Hindi ko na yata way to?"

Nasa kotse niya kami. Pangingiti siyang mgdadrive na parang walang naririnig. Hindi ko rin alam kung paano siya pinayagang makalabas or baka tumakas na naman siya. Wala na talaga akong masyadong pakialam, for me being with him is enough. That was all I ever need.

"Are you kidnapping me?"

"itatanan kita.."

seryoso niyang sagot.

"Tell me you're not serious?"

He didn't reply. Instead he ignored me and didn't say anything at all.

I have a right to freak out. Nobody could ever blame me if at that moment I'm going to lost my life.

I closed my eyes and begun asking God for forgiveness.

Tiningnan ko siya ulit at ganun pa rin hindi pa rin siya tumitingin. No way he can be serious.

"Brother Johann..what are you doing?"

He shook his head. No words.

I sighed deeply and sink myself on the car seat.

"I love you so much but I think God wouldn't like it.."

He chuckles finding my statement funny.

"What?"

Sabi ko ulit sa kanya. Tumawa na siya ng malakas at doon na lang ako nakahinga ng tama.

"you are so......"

"handsome.."

"Yeah right.."

"don't worry pakakasalan muna kita bago ko gawin yon.."

Napangiti ako. Nagbibiro man siya o wala para sa akin nakakakilig yon.

"dapat lang.."

maiksi kong tugon. Ngumiti nalang siya at nagpatuloy sa pagdrive. Ilang minuto pa bago siya tumigil.

He help me to get down on the car. I looked around and notice that were in some exclusive subdivision. We stopped on a big black heights gate. I looked at him demanding an explanation. He smile reached for my hand and put it near his chest.

Oh shit!

"don't tell me its your...?"

When he didn't answer and pulled me closer to him instead, I know I'm right. No way were in here. No way I'm going in in that gate and face all the people in there.

"No!"

I tell him sternly.

"Yes..as if may choice ka andito na tayo.."

Hinatak ko ang kamay ko para mabitawan niya. Kung ano man ang pumasok sa utak niya for sure nasisiraan na siya ng ulo.

"Johann...it's not the right time yet. Ano nalang sasabihin ng Dad mo? He expected me to do the right thing and that right thing is to stay away from you. Now you want me to face him again?Ngayon pa na tayo na?"