Playing with Fire: A BLACKPINK Story

Chapter 29: The Person I Have Become

2019.

I wasn't sure how much time had passed. Just because Hyun-suk had agreed to meet with me did not mean that they let up. They all had their reasons to hate me considering the way I had gone up against them over and over again. I didn't blame them, but that didn't mean I was happy about it.

My biggest fear wasn't dying. I knew that in the life that I lived, death was always a possibility. I had come to terms with that a long time ago and made my peace with it. What scared me was the thought of dying without being able to say goodbye to Jisoo. She would never be able to understand why I had done what I had done. Even if Amelie did explain it to her, it wouldn't have made anything better. I knew how damaging it could be to suddenly lose people that you cared about. Especially when it happened with no warning.

It didn't matter. I had no intention of allowing myself to die before exacting my plan on Hyun-suk. Nor did they intend on killing me—doing so would not be taken well by their boss, especially since he was flying out to see me.

Of course, that didn't mean they planned on taking it easy on me. Clearly that was not the case.

I utilized every technique that I had learned over my years of experience to keep myself alive and sane. It didn't matter if you showed pain—it mattered if you let it break you. There was no shame in admitting pain. There was no point in pretending to be tough. It could be a useful tool at times if you wanted to unnerve your adversary, but in situations like this, it was pointless.

I stayed focused on Jisoo, on the girls. I recalled my happiest memories with them. I thought about what the future would bring and how wonderful it would be to finally be free of the shadows of everything that had plagued us for so long.

If I could just... hold out... a little longer.

I already knew I would be able to—the trick now was just actually doing it. I wondered what Amelie was thinking. I wondered how many times she had needed to convince herself to not come charging in. I imagined that since she could tell that no one had permanently left the building, she wasn't that worried yet.

Yet.

I could only imagine what was going through Jisoo's head. This had taken far longer than I had anticipated, which meant she had probably left America at this point. There was no way she thought that I had just disappeared again, but surely she realized that something had happened.

In either case, I swore to myself that once this was done, nothing would separate us again. This was the last time.

For now, all I could do was hold on and pray that time came soon. I needed her now more than ever.

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Jisoo.

I felt guilty, but it couldn't be helped. I needed to do something and this was the only option that was still open to me. I didn't tell the girls what I was doing either, which only increased my guilt, but I didn't have a choice. Yoongi was my only hope at that point. I knew Lisa wouldn't be happy if she found out I was dragging Jungkook's friends into this again, but I had to.

I just had to.

Luckily, we were all on the same page on at least one thing. The girls agreed to help me buy a little more time in America before we needed to leave. It was necessary if I wanted to launch a rescue operation.

It only took Yoongi a day to get here. He sounded jetlag on the phone, but he promised me he was ready to go. He wanted me to meet him at a nearby hotel—one that was deliberately old and rundown. I promised him I could slip away from the YG people and make it to him in a few minutes.