A lot of these are the basic af ones you see a lot, some I made up just cuz
Philza: Do you ever want to talk about your feelings Techno?
Techno: No
Tommy: I want to talk about my feelings!
Philza: I know Tommy
Tommy: Im sad!
Philza: I know Tommy
Ranboo: whats the fear of chainsaws called?
Purpled: Fucking common sense
Tubbo: *looks up from his book* Arkoudaphobia
Tommy: ... What happens when you don't have that phobia?
Purpled: then your either stupid or insane. Either way I won't trust you with chainsaws any time soon
Philza: Good morning!
Techno: Mornin.
Wilbur: Good morn
Tommy: you all sound like robots. Spice it up a little!
Tubbo: PLEASANT MORNING FUCKERS
Young Tommy: Mr.Shlatt? Whats an achoholic (i cant spell the word im sorry lol)
Schlatt: well Tommy, you see those two sheep over there? An achoholic would see four.
Young Tommy:... theres only one sheep?
Tommy: *stares at Ranboo*
Tommy: If looks could kill you would already have lost all your canon lives by now.
Ranboo:.. Tommy if looks could kill your death message would have stated you were slain by an imposible amount of people.
Tubbo: no no, hes got a point
Tommy: what would happen if someone ate three raw eggs?
Ranboo: They would probably die.
Tubbo: *from of the other room* DID YOU ASK HIM YET?!
Ranboo: ... please dont tell me you guys-
Tommy: By any chance do you know how far the nearest hospital is?
Ranboo: *disappointed parental like sigh*
Tommy and Purpled: *eating the last powdered donuts*
Tubbo: *knocks on wardrobe door* what are you doing in there
Purpled:..uh- Drugs
*caramelldansen plays in the background*
Tommy singing along: ONE TWO SEVEN THREE MY FATHER DOES NOT LOVE ME AND NOR DOES ANYONE IN MY FAMILY
Ranboo: *Concerned motherly noises*
Purpled: THE FLOOR IS LAVA! *jumps onto the sofa*
Tubbo: *pushes Ranboo off the sofa as a joke*
Ranboo: my time has come
Tubbo: *dramatically* Ranboo NOOOOOOO
Tubbo: Welcome to Tubbees! Would you like the Tub or the Bees?
Wilbur: Bee's?
Tubbo: HE HAS CHOSEN THE BEES
Wilbur: wait no I didnt-
Tommy: *rapidly approaching with a jar of angry bees*
Tubbo: Yo is Tommy sleeping or dead?
Ranboo: Hopefully dead, I hated his guts.
Purpled: Yeah, so did I.
Tommy getting up: Okay first of all, fuck you-
Tubbo, banging on the door: Tommy! Open up!
Tommy: Well, it all started when I was a kid...
Purpled: No, he meant-
Ranboo: Let him finish.
Cop: You're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Tubbo: Shit.
Tommy: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Purpled: OH MY GOD RANBOO FELL OFF!!!
Tubbo: How's the sexiest person here~?
Ranboo: I don't know, how are they~?
Tubbo, flustered: I-
Tommy, from across the room: I'm doing great, thanks!
FOR THE RECORD THIS ONE IS A JOKE- THIS IS HOW THEY JOKE YOU SHIPPING LITTLE TURDS (AND THOSE TURDS WHO WANNA GET MAD FOR NO REASON-)
Dream, negotiating with Tommy: We have Ranboo. Give us ten thousand dollars and he will be returned to you unharmed
Ranboo: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I'm only worth ten thousand dollars?
Dream & Tommy: ...
Ranboo: MAKE IT ONE MILLION–
Tommy: RANBOO STOP
Tubbo, in a high voice, holding barbie: hey ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!
Tommy, in a deep voice, holding ken: nonsense, barbie. you're staying home and having my kids
Ranboo: what the heck are you guys doing?
Tubbo: playing systemic oppression
YOU ARE READING
Myct SbI angst + fluff oneshots (read desc)
FanfictionSilly sleepy bois fics (mostly tommy centric - still includes all the sbi in almost every fic)- I'd recommend skipping the old chapters n diving into the new ones btw - I DO NOT ASSOCIATE WITH THE IRL CONTENT CREATOR OF WILLIAM GOLD!! THE WILBUR CHA...
