Losing Game -Rosenali

i'm sorry

  Rosé shifted anxiously as she tried to figure out what to say to Denali. She had a whole plan in her head to come talk to Denali and at least get some closure but in all honesty she never expected Denali to hear her out so in her haste to apologize she hadn't actually planned a speech.

"Do you wanna go for a drive or something while we talk?" Rosé asked, trying to buy herself some more time plan what she was going to say. Denali hesitated for a few moments before responding.

"Uhh... Yeah sure, let me go grab my keys." Rosé only had to wait for a few minutes for Denali to return with her phone, some shoes, and her house keys. Rosé took a deep breath as she held the car door open for Denali just like she used to when they were still together. Denali blushed a little and whispered a thank you as she climbed in the passenger seat.

The beginning of the drive consisted of silence, Rosé driving and Denali staring out the window. Rosé looked at the car's mirrors to watch Denali, her heart breaking every time she watched Denali nervously shift or bite her lip. Her heart broke because she knew this could have all been easily avoided if she was honest with her.

"I need to apologize." Rosé blurted out suddenly, causing Denali to jump slightly at the loud outburst. "I should have never taken the dare, I should have told you about it, I shouldn't have blown up at you last night, I should never have said that about your mom. That was really shitty of me, that's the person I used to be and I'm not that person anymore."

Denali remained silent, Rosé assumed she didn't know how to respond so she kept talking. "I'm sorry for everything I said about you and Dahlia, it's just when I get drunk and jealous I tend to lash out. I know you guys are just platonic and even if you aren't, it's none of my business because we're not together anymore. And you were right, I obviously still care about you but that doesn't give me the right to treat everyone badly."

Rosé waited for Denali to speak but she was still silent. "Is it overstepping if I ask you to respond?" She asked, half kidding, half wanting Denali to respond because the silence was killing her.

"I just don't know what to say."

"I don't know, just whatever's on your mind I guess."

"I saw you last night." Denali stated plainly, still looking out the window.

"Yeah I know, we talked and got into a huge fight. That's part of what I apologized for." Rosé replied, a little confused. Maybe she's still drunk? She thought to herself. Maybe that's why she agreed to talk? 

Denali turned in the passenger seat so that she was facing Rosé, finally removing her gaze from the window to the girl next to her. Rosé didn't know if Denali looking at her was a good thing or a bad thing. Denali was quiet for few more uncomfortable moments before she finally spoke again.

"I saw you with Mik last night." She turned away from Rosé again as soon as she said it, turning back towards the window. Rosé felt her heart drop in her chest, she felt like all the air had left her arms momentarily. She listened as Denali kept talking.

"I know I'm not allowed to be upset because we're not together anymore but it sucked to see. Especially since you had just accused me of getting with Dahlia, which I didn't by the way. But you probably already knew that."

"I'm sorry," Rosé whispered, having no idea what to say. She didn't know that Denali had seen her and Mik last night and she wasn't planning on telling her. As the car went silent again Rosé noticed a pattern and silently cursed herself. She realized she should have just told Denali about her and Mik hooking up last night if she really wanted this apology to work.

"I should have told you about it this morning" she said, glancing at Denali to watch her reaction. Denali just shrugged, still looking out the window.