𝑨 𝑻𝑶𝑼𝑪𝑯 𝑶𝑭 𝑫𝑨𝑹𝑲𝑵𝑬𝑺𝑺

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟑𝟔: 𝐈𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡

"SO PROFESSOR, TO what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Trust me Lilith." Dumbledore replied as he held open the door to his office, his hand encouraging Lilith to enter first. "The pleasure is still all mine." Lilith smiled at him in return.

Dumbledore had placed himself behind his desk while Lilith had sat herself down in a chair, her eyes fluttered around the room admiring the grand and yet simplistic feel that his office had. It represented Dumbledore entirely and she couldn't help but envision Minerva and him sharing a box of chocolates speaking about Merlin knows what.

"So is that a yes?" Dumbledore concluded although Lilith wasn't even aware what he was concluding.

"Uhm..." She cleared her throat, not really sure if she should just agree to whatever Dumbledore had proposed or own up to her zoning out state.
"Forgive me, I wasn't... listening." She smiled at him apologetically.

Dumbledore returned her smile with a sympathetic one and sighed. "Lilith, it's clear that you're still hurting but you also keep running away from the truth." He sighed. "I asked if you would be willing to look in the pensieve... Severus wants to see his side of this."

Lilith tensed at his name. "No." She replied stonily.

"Lilith please, this isn't Severus asking anymore. I'm asking you now." There was conflict within Dumbledore's tone, she understood what he meant. It was unfair how her life had suddenly become part of everyone else's and everyone else was most probably tired of dealing with her outbursts and constant look of pain. Lilith was tired of it and she simultaneously hated herself for it so she was surprised that no one had slapped some sense into her already. She relaxed her shoulders and visibly softened.

"Professor, I respect you too much to object against your words but on this instance I really must refuse. No matter how much of a rift that has come between Severus and I, I will always refuse to look into his mind even if he has agreed on me doing so. No one can ever truly be completely accepting of someone else being in their mind, it's not... normal." Lilith stopped speaking and slowly lifted her gaze to Dumbledore, half expecting him to look angry but instead he looked intrigued.

"We are all given our own minds. And if someone truly belonged and had the right to our minds then we wouldn't have an individual way of thinking. What Severus has done is damaging but I will never degrade him by invading the only place that is truly his. I understand that to some it's all nothing but mere memories but when you've had your own memories tested, pushed to the limit, twisted or even obliviated... it's hard to believe that anything about you belongs to you and to you alone. I can't say when or give a date and time, but I will forgive Severus, I want to forgive Severus. But I have to be the one to do that, I can't be persuaded into forgiveness by outside parties."

Dumbledore had been mindlessly brushing his hand across his desk as Lilith had spoke, once she had finished he felt a greater wave of understanding to her character. It was undoubtable that Lilith was a peculiar person in terms of her thinking and her behaviour as a whole, but that didn't make her an outcast. It made her real. It made her attached to her soul in a way that no magic could ever comprehend. Lilith was truly divine and magical in her own way. He nodded at her to show his understanding and agreement.

"I think you posses a rare kind of beauty, Lilith. The beauty of the fact that you are so utterly unaware of your own beauty; all the way from how think to how you hold yourself. You aren't swayed like many others and no matter how much pressure seems to be piled onto you, you never really collapse under it. The truth is Lilith, it made no difference if you agreed to use the pensieve or not. Like I said, it was me asking. I asked you today because only through you can I understand Severus and simultaneously only through Severus can I understand you."