Phantom Love

Chapter 28

     I look back at Em and smile nervously as we make our way back to the penthouse in the early hours of the morning. It's super early so usually only Dre and Em are awake by now. Since Em is with me and Dre is almost as down for shenanigans as Kieran is I'm not too worried about surprising the guys with our new family member. What I am worried about though is the fact that Em's mark hasn't showed up. Mine did about an hour ago and it hurt like a bitch but his hasn't. I know he'll get it eventually but I'm not ready for the pain it'll put him in. 

       It's my fault he'll be in pain at all. I try to bat away those intrusive thoughts by finding something else to focus on. A movement against my chest has me looking down.

      Luna's tiny kitten body is curled up on my chest as my one hand holds on to her, the other hand free since Em insisted he could carry everything. Using Em's security card I scan it before unlocking the door and opening it a crack to peek my head in. Not hearing a lot of movement I make, what I assume are, super spy like hand gestures to let him know the coast is clear. He gives me a smirk before moving past me, his arms full of cat equipment. I try to keep up the spy session but my hand moves in a way that showcases my new mate mark and I can't help but get distracted by it. 

       From the bottoms of my nails to just above the bend of my elbow small filigree cherry blossom branches stretch across my arm. There are a few blossoms sprouting among the branches but it's very scattered and not as filled in as I thought it would be. I asked Huginn and Muninn about it and they said the flowers will grow as the connection grows. Makes sense, I'm just a very impatient bitch. What? You try being patient for decades and then trying to make yourself be patient about literally anything ever again. I'm brought out of my thoughts by the sight of Em's fantastic ass disappearing down the hallway. Dammit, I missed I perfectly good opportunity to oggle one of my men. I feel like being this distractable isn't healthy or normal. I should ask Em about that once he's done arranging everything.

       I already told him to put all of the things in my room because, let's be honest, I won't be using it much. Sleeping with the guys is just way too perfect to pass up. It also gives me a higher chance of orgasms. It's nice to have my own space, yes, but I can't stand being alone for too long. It makes me feel like back in the in-between, unseen and unheard. I think the guys have picked up on that too which is why they never leave me alone. Someone is always in the apartment with me, making noise and reassuring me that I'm not alone once again. They each take time to train with me in their own strengths and the training, as well as the colossal amount of food I've been eating, has been paying off, giving me a layer of defined muscle along the entirety of my body. 

      It's sweet of them and it does wonders for my anxiety but at the same time I'm beating myself up because I don't want them to have to rearrange their lives to fit me. I need to get over my shit and be able to stand on my own two feet. Metaphorically anyway, there's no way I can guarantee I'll stay upright and on my own literal two feet at any moment. I also need to find a way to contribute. Forrest deals with running their company, Em deals with research and tech to support the guys as well as the company, Drazik deals with the finances, Dre is kind of the unofficial cook with Em stepping in if he's at work, and Kieran is happy to do all the busy work around the house to keep his mind occupied. Dre, Kieran, and Drazik all have their side jobs as well which just makes me feel like a bum. 

      I found out that numbers are not my thing, I look at anything finance related and my brain just short circuits while elevator music plays somewhere in the back of my mind. Speaking of, the elevator music they have in this building is so incredibly boring, I should try to see if they'll let me create a playlist for that. Anyway, I'm not good with super technical shit but people? I'm good with people. I've been toying with the idea of doing something to help people better their lives. Like maybe a shelter for the homeless? I've noticed that's quite an issue in this big city. I asked Em why that was and he explained how the cost of everything in a city is more expensive and it's hard for a lot of people to keep up when the human government thinks overworking and underpaying them is a reasonable thing to do.