TinCan ff - Flaws & Faults

XVIII (flashback part - ix)

present:

"I don't know what will I do without you, Cantaloupe," he kissed the sleeping man's nose "If only you know how I truly feel about you," he held his shoulders and caressed him and inhaled his scent "Will you be mine?"

...

Can opened his eyes and found himself lying on top of Tin, his head on his chest.

He looked up at the latter who appeared to be asleep. He gazed upon the flawless face and came close.

his hands caressed his cheeks, his jawline and his lips.

He shed a couple of tears in the corner of his eyes.

he heard everything!

"I promise you, Tin! I will never make the same mistake again," he kissed the latter's fingers "I will never be yours!" 

he slowly went back to his previous position and slept on the latter.

He wiped the streams of tears on his face and his mind wandered somewhere...

Flashback part - ix:

Can forced himself to get up from the bed, took a shower, and put on some clean clothes. With the numbness spreading all over his body, he walked to the living room.

The evening air was too cold for him so he took a duvet with him and fell on Tin's couch and breathed slowly while thinking about all that has happened.

He felt so empty and heavy at the same time.

He felt his heart crush every single time Tin did something bad to him but it would mend so easily when he held him close.

Tin never really opened up to him, it was only Can who spoke all the time giving away all his details and information of his life Can never had the guts to ask him.

Thinking back he realized maybe Tin was just fooling with him. But he also felt like everything was just in mind and Tin was just a good guy as he thought. Can thought he was too demanding that's why Tin behaved so.

But after what had happened yesterday he couldn't just shake it off and move on. It was so clear that Tin was embarrassed by him. It all might've been easier if Tin said he was embarrassed by him and just to leave him be.

Can could feel drops of tears falling on his hands as they flowed down his cheeks. The boy's girls were all red and rheumy.

Can covered himself with the duvet and curled up. He was so exhausted from the sore pains and those mixed thoughts he's been having.

But now, after a few hours in the absence of Tin he had made up his mind. Now there is no turning back from the decision.

He was sitting in sadness listening to the tick of the clock and waiting for Tin to be back.

~

After a couple more hours of waiting, Tin showed up. His steps were slow and careful. He was dressed in a matte black tux and he held his coat in his hand.