Possible Friendships

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You spent a lot of time in town this time. You had a few days off, and for the first time you weren't sure how you were going to spend it. Normally you would take the dogs for a walk down river, and practice your fighting stances with the trees, or cooking meals for the week. Right now you weren't even sure you had enough food to last another day in the house. Having company, something that you haven't had since before you were taken by Hydra, felt awkward. You didn't know them, except what you read in the papers or on the internet when you were in town. You had always admired their strength and capabilities. You remembered when they had a huge falling out a few years ago, and Captain America was even a fugitive. Honestly, you never signed the accords and never wanted to. You didn't ask to be enhanced. You remember begging them not to do it. You were just a child when it happened. The nightmares still ravaged you if you slept more than a few hours at a time. One of the reasons you preferred to sleep outside. That, and the gentle rocking of the swing reminded you of when you were safe. Hydra would keep you in a cage swinging from the ceiling when they were going to let you rest for a few days. When the experiments were going to happen, you had to sleep on a dirty mattress in a tiny cell waiting any moment for them to come and take you. Being in a bed was hard, which made the winter's brutal. You tried to bring in the swing once, but it was too big to fit in the living room.
One thing that was nice, is you hadn't had any panic attacks yet. At least not in front of them. You hated to seem weak, which might be why its been so much fun to spar earlier. You really did enjoy yourself, even if there was touching involved. It even almost felt nice, like when Natasha would touch your shoulder. Not that you would ever admit it.

While you shopped, you took a moment to think about them as individuals. Natasha, you could see yourself being friends with. She was easy to be around, and seemed to be even a bit mischievous. You liked that about her. She had so much confidence, you wished you had that too. Bruce seemed kind hearted, and a little excited about your abilities. Tony didn't bother hiding how excited he was about your abilities. He seemed to ooze confidence, just like Natasha. With him, it was almost cocky. Sam, he seemed like a jokester but he had a good heart. He said what he was thinking, and didn't hold back. Steve, he seemed very kind but always observing. It was like he was testing you constantly, like he was checking to see what your limits were. You had enjoyed sparring with him. You knew that he let you hit him at least once, but to be honest you had done the same. Bucky, or James Barnes. Now he was interesting. He didn't say much, and seemed to just take in all the information. No doubt he was the most handsome man you had ever seen in your life, but that made him a bit scarier to you. You had shut off those kinds of feelings a long time ago. But that didn't mean you were going to lie either. He was mysterious, and sexy as hell.

You ended up buying a months' worth of food by the time you were done at the grocery store. There were a lot of curious glances in your direction but you weren't really up for explaining yourself to anyone in town. So much for that extra tip money. At least it went to a good cause. You filled up the back of the pickup truck and drove home with more new music downloading while you left the service area. You knew using this much data was a bad idea but you couldn't resist. Music is what helped you the most.
Parking the truck, you were pleased to see the hydra jet was finally gone and there was no one in the cabin. Thankfully, that meant you had some space for a little bit longer. Chewy, Harry and Leia were laying on the front of the porch by the door guarding the house while Lily was laying in a sunny spot near the swing. You brought in all the groceries, and put them away. You hadn't realized you never really stocked the cupboards before. It seemed foolish to do before since you didn't know from one week to the next if you would have to skip town. Once your company left though, you would go back to how it was. You always kept a backpack with money and new id ready to go at all times. If Hydra ever found out you lived, their little Blue Phoenix, you would be hunted until the day you died. Even then, maybe they would use you for parts.

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