Where's My Happy Ending (Sad Bakugo)

Chapter 14

God-shit-fuck. I messed up. Real bad.

Tears were streaming down Bakugo's face. I fucked it up again. I yelled. They hate when I yell. 

Bakugo was hyperventilating, laying in the floor in his sweat. Glaring at the ceiling, at his life falling apart. There were no words to describe how he felt. Utterly incapable is a good start though.

Bakugo was overwhelmed with thoughts. Drowning in them. Choking on god damn air, because that felt more foreign than tears. You're just some pathetic loser who hurts everyone there close to. No, no, no, I-i'm not! Look at Izuku, you ruined his life. I didn't mean to, I swear. I-i didn't want to hurt him! I love him! Ha, but it doesn't matter. You still hurt him. You will always be alone. NO! Kirshima's there for me... Kirishima doesn't care about you, he just pities you. SHUT UP! KIRISHIMA CARES. IZUKU CARES. THE CLASS CARES. I. AM. NOT. ALONE!!! You are a fuck up and you know it. Thats why you pretend your not. You put up this big scary mask because you know once you reveal who you really are they will laugh at your face. Fuck...

Yep. Bakugo was lost in his thoughts. Call him Atlas. Carrying the wait of his world on his shoulders, crashing violently into other planents, unable to control his movements or his responsibilities. He was given air that was only was to be taken away from him. He was loved never when needed. Bakugo was a breaking boy that patiently waited for a break. A break that was certain to never come.

Sobbing, Bakugo stumbled out of his bed. His heart was physically strangling him, he hated it. 

As he limped to the bathroom his phone started ringing. Sighing, the boy, wiped his tears away and took a gulp of water to make it sound as if he hadn't been crying.

His thumb fumbled with his phone before he finally hit accept button. 

"Hi, is this Bakugo Katsuki." a man spoke on the other end of the phone. His voice monotone.

"Eh, yes?" Bakugo only spoke in a whisper. He was conflicted with emotions and didn't know how to pretend at the moment. 

"Well, I am a doctor at the hospital near by and well... I have some bad news."

Bakugo's heart dropped. "What... what is it." 

"Well, someone reported seeing a body. And unfortauntely by the looks of the DNA they are related to you. They are okay but-" Bakugo didn't let the doctor finish. He hung up.

His head was so lost. Who could of it been. His dad? Completely lost, broken, and well conflicted, bakugo began sobbing. 

His head fell and he broke down. The very little mask he still had up shattered. 

He was only a boy. Not some angry, strong boy. Just a boy.

This little boys heart yearned for someone at the moment. Maybe his mother, maybe Izuku, maybe Kirishima. But he desired to be held. 

But he could never ask...

As hours went by, Bakugo sat on his bed, his eyes bloodshot. HE didn't speak, he didn't think, he barely even breathed.

Eventually his saddness began to turn into anger. HE wanted to scream, yell, punch something. But he feared to walk out of his dorm. So, instead he grabbed his headphones and his phone. He played some music and hummed to the beat.

He let himself go into the music, forgetting his reality. 

(Best fucking song ever.)

As the lyrics began to be sung, Bakugo joined in. He expressed everything in that moment. 

"I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU! WHY DO I LOVE YOU!!!! I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU! Why do I love you..." He yelled, cried, and spoke the words, letting himself just drown under the weight of his world. 

He didn't try to push the urge away. The urge to hug someone. The urge to scream. The urge to kill himself.

He refused to struggle. He was done struggling in life. If life was going to be a slice of hell. He would eat that slice without a fucking care. If someone wanted to kill him, then who gives a fuck. Bakugo was done being... him. Because it was draining, he was melachony, boring, and always too angry. 

.

.

.

But losing a pair of feelings such as anger and depression isn't easy. You can't just wish that everything was better and it magically becomes better. But boy did Bakugo wish life was like that.

(I love both the song and the Amv that I put in this chapter! Also, sorry that this is so short!)