Crossing The Line (Seulrene)

The Days Along the Line

When Joohyun saw Seulgi again, it was Monday morning in class. She didn't address her nor even looked in her direction. She did her best to avoid her but inevitably crossed her gaze. She was quick to avert her own despite the attraction she felt toward those gorgeous eyes. They haunted her even at night.

On Tuesday, she caught herself staring at her in literature class when their teacher was reading to them. She observed Seulgi at the front of the class, underlining the features of her face she could distinguish from behind, and traced her toned body with her eyes. She only stopped when their teacher slammed the book shut and instructed them to work on the first paragraph. She cleared her throat, kicking herself mentally for slipping again.

On Wednesday evening, she found herself staring at the ceiling, laying under the warm covers, but everything felt cold. She turned her head, glancing at Seulgi's hoodie still on the floor at the corner of her room. She closed her eyes, turning her face back toward the ceiling, and tried to find sleep but she wasn't feeling the slightest fatigue despite the tiring school day. She squirmed in her bed while her mind got invaded by the taller girl once again, this time though it wasn't with innocent thoughts. She pictured her on top of her, touching her body as she did on Saturday. Her exhale became close to a moan. She shut her eyes harder, turning Seulgi into a man. Seulgi wasn't going to win this. She was going to prove her wrong. She slipped her hand under her pajama pants and began to touch herself, imagining this man fuck her. However, nothing went as planned. Flashes of Seulgi kept intruding her fantasy and every time she did, it gave Joohyun a new wave of arousal. In the end, that nameless man had been useless and Joohyun orgasmed with Seulgi on her mind. She growled in frustration after she finished and her throat tightened, tears falling silently down her face « Why me? » She choked up. After years of silent hatred, why did she see Seulgi like this now?

On Thursday, she bumped into Seulgi's shoulder when the taller girl was ready to greet her as they passed by each other in an empty hallway. Her fist clenched, she wanted to punch her so badly for making her feel this way and making her question her entire existence. But at the same time, she felt immense guilt for treating her this way. However, her facade of anger was what kept her from losing it all.

Seulgi managed to get under her skin until the end of the school week and on Friday night, Joohyun had had enough. She went back to the club, searching for the perfect distraction. She didn't like Seulgi. She wasn't attracted to women. She wasn't a lesbian. And she was going to prove it with the real deal.

She ended up in a handsome man's bed, underneath him as he made sure to explore every inch of her body. Any woman would say he was marvelous in bed but Joohyun....Well......She didn't get the result she was hoping for. Because even though he pleased her with everything she could have asked for, it felt flat compared to Seulgi. She realized that maybe with every man she had ever been with it had always felt this way. And even after she asked him to go harder and harder to reach the point where Seulgi had taken her, it still wasn't it. At some point, the image of him on top of her became Seulgi and that's when it burned inside her again. That's when she felt alive again. But Seulgi was destroying her and she somehow convinced herself that the man wasn't good enough and that maybe if she tried again it would go better. So the next evening, she was with another man but this time no bed was involved. He took her on every surface he could and Joohyun came back home with the moonlight guiding her way and the fresh air hit her face, freezing the tears falling down her cheeks. After a long burning shower, she kneeled near her desk, taking Seulgi's black hoodie into her fragile trembling hands, and hugged it against her chest, welcoming the sweet scent into her nostrils. She got into bed, in a fetal position, hugging the hoodie as close as she could. For the first time since she left Seulgi's home after the storm, she slept like a baby.