Over Again (Niall Horan Fanfiction)

Touché

Taylor Swift - Enchanted, Shawn Mendes -  It'll Be Okay, Jenna Raine - see you later

'Honestly,' I take a minute to gather my messed up thoughts. 'My mind was telling me to forget everything, to leave it all behind.' Why is it so hard to talk? I breathe in, out, and continue 'but my heart was secretly waiting...for him to appear around the corner, on the street, in public places, cafes.'  I brush through my hair with my fingers, trying to hold back any possible tears.

'Just because he didn't come yet, it doesn't mean that he won't.' Jenny's words give me hope. Damn it! I wanted to make it seem impossible, make myself believe so.

'Even if he does, how could he forgive me?' Jenny rolled her eyes at me as a loud sigh leaves her lips.

'What the fuck would he have to forgive you? Stop blaming yourself before he even did, which doesn't mean he will!' She pints her finger at me, to stop me from arguing. 'It takes two for this. Don't carry double the weight on your back.' I know that but I can't help myself. Can he even be held responsible if I don't even tell him? See, it's only me! 'It's like carrying all bags of groceries alone, they are heavy as shit, cutting into your hands. But if you only hold the half, it would hurt less. Agree?'

'Could you carry the other half?' I give her my best puppy eyes, hoping for her to give in.

'I'll drop it at his front door!' She says rather loudly, as if it's a command, firm decision on her own. We both burst out laughing, with both hands hurting, but at least we take care of our wounds for each other.

'I'm going to get you that appointment, after it, you can decide.' She says standing up. I know that there is nothing I could say to stop her from doing so.

I hear her greeting someone as she was leaving out of the room.

'How are you feeling?' I look up, her voice made me nervous. Nervous about what to say next.

'Oh, so nice seeing you here!' I give my best smile as I face Niall's mother. 'I'm better.' I try looking around, finding something to concentrate on but she just seems too kind to ignore or act rudely around.

'I heard that you are carrying a baby, so I wanted to congratulate you!' I almost choke on my own saliva as those words leave her mouth. Someone must be fucking kidding me! But what did I think, her working here wouldn't let her know I'm pregnant?

'That, yes, um, thank you.' I sound as if someone just told me the most devastating news, but I can't help myself. I can't force my body to be happy about it.

'Are you alone here? I suppose the father will be here as well?' This time, I can't control my body. I start coughing as if I've been just pulled out of the water, almost drowning. I think this topic still is too much for my nervous body. I feel sick. God!

'I'm so sorry!' She pats me on the back but I stand up, moving away from her. I do it slowly so I don't seem rude. ' I didn't mean to intrude in your privacy! Zayn told me you were with them but on your own. I'm just worried.' Why? I guess my face gave her enough answers as she continues.

'I apologise.' She moves back. 'I primarily came to tell you that Niall asked to see you, so if you feel better, you could visit?' My eyes widen in shock as a slight pain evolved in my head, spinning this whole room around. I shake my head and try concentrating on her words.

I simply stare at her with nothing to say, completely helpless.

'Should she come to you? I can bring her in here?' She looks worried.

'Huh, bring who?' What is she talking about?

'Gigi, the one that wanted to see you.' I must be going insane! What has gotten into me?