on temporizing || Dream SMP Timeloop Fic

Chapter 2

6. (credit to Trytokillmeorsomething123)

"What," said Sapnap the moment he stepped onto Tommy's exile beach.

"Welcome to Stonestedshire," Dream announced cheerily, gesturing to the Very Tall cobblestone tower that loomed over them. "We would have called it Cobblestonestedshire, but that took too long to say."

"What." Sapnap repeated flatly. Dream ignored his confusion, brushing past him and heading towards the tower. Ghostbur floated after him, humming cheerily.

Sapnap exchanged looks with Bad, then followed.

Dream stopped at the base of the tower. Cupping his hands over his mouth, he rocked back on his heels and took a deep breath. "TOMMY!" he shouted. "TOMMY, LET DOWN YOUR LADDER!"

There was a moment of silence. Then: "FUCK YOU!"

Dream hopped nimbly aside as a large chunk of stone crashed down where he had been standing seconds before. "THAT WASN'T VERY NICE, TOMMY!" he called.

"FUCK YOU!" Tommy bellowed again. A rope ladder was tossed out of the window near the top of the tower. Dream tried to back up as the ladder unfurled, but he was too slow. The end whipped him across the face.

"GAH!" he cried. "WHY?!"

"YOU TOLD ME TO LET DOWN MY LADDER, BITCH!"

"I TOLD YOU TO LET IT DOWN, NOT TO DROP IT ON MY HEAD!"

"YOU WERE STANDING TOO CLOSE TO THE FUCKING TOWER!"

"IT HURT!"

"IT HIT YOUR STUPID MASK, YOU BASTARD!"

Dream burst into wheezing laughter.

"Uh," Bad said intelligently. "What?"

Sapnap stared at Dream. ". . . Why is Tommy in a tower?"

Tommy poked his head over the side of said tower and proceeded to flip them all off.

7.

"It was never meant to be," Wilbur whispered, a rueful smile on his face. He pressed the button.

"Oh my god," said Philza, his eyes fixed on it. Slowly, his gaze traveled up to Wilbur. "You didn't."

Wilbur smiled. He raised his hand in a mournful salute.

And then Philza was lunging forward, wings spread wide, yanking Wilbur back as explosions sounded around them. The room shook, dust and dirt raining from the ceiling. Both men shut their eyes, bracing themselves.

Gradually, the tremors stopped. Cautiously, Philza looked up, half-crouched over his son.

The room was. . . surprisingly intact, actually. The chair was a few inches away from its original place, and the floor was littered with pebbles, but the walls were mostly undamaged.

Or at least they were, until Tommy tore through them with a shout of "SURPRISE, BITCH!" and lobbed a block of lit TNT at them. Philza jerked away, already knowing that he would be too slow to dodge--

The 'TNT' burst into a cloud of glitter. Wilbur and Philza were left blinking stupidly at Tommy as he burst into raucous cackling.

"Oh Prime!" he wheezed, doubling over as he wiped his eyes with one glitter-dusted arm. "You look-- you look so fuckin' stupid!"

An ender pearl shattered against the stone. Dream appeared, landing lightly next to Tommy. He took in the sight of Philza and a very-much-not-stabbed Wilbur Soot, and breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank Prime."