Chapter 11

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51.

"He's nothing but a pawn, Tommy!" Dream shouted.

"Shut the fuck up, bitch," Tommy snarled, hurling something at his head. Dream caught it on reflex.

"Wh-- a pawn?" he asked incredulously, only to get hit in the mask with another pawn.

"I have more," Tommy threatened, holding up a fistful of small, wooden chess pieces. "Don't call Tubbo a pawn."

Tubbo, standing on the sidelines, looked half-bewildered and half-amused. "Uh, Tommy, it's okay--"

"No, no, no, it's not okay," Tommy snapped, jabbing a finger in his direction. "You are a fucking human being. You make your own life decisions. You're not a pawn."

Dream cleared his throat. And was promptly hit in the chestplate with another pawn.

"I didn't even say anything!" he protested, then glanced down at the pawn lying on the floor. "Wh-- is that made out of netherite?"

"Shut," Tommy snapped, pointing a threatening finger at him. He rounded on Tubbo. "You're not. A. Pawn. Repeat it after me, Tubbo."

Tubbo gave him an exhausted half-smile. "Tommy. . ."

"Say it."

Tubbo shrugged. "He's right, though. I'm a pawn." He gestured to the blackstone walls around them. "And this is checkmate. Better to just accept it."

Tommy gritted his teeth and rounded on Dream. "This is all your fucking fault," he accused. "Now Tubbo's making fuckin' chess metaphors."

Dream sighed. "Tommy--"

A pawn enchanted with Knockback II sent him crashing into the wall.


52. remix, pt. 1

Tommy slammed a picture down onto the courtroom table. It was an image of George's burning house. A picture of Dream giving the camera a thumbs up, which had obviously been cut out of another picture, was glued into the space next to the house.

Tommy pointed at the paper. "Caught in 4K, bitch!"

A long moment of silence. Dream stared down at the picture, expression hidden behind his mask. Tubbo cringed and waited for the fallout.

"Oh, no," Dream said dully. "You caught me. I lied, I burned down George's house. Guess this means I have to go into exile."

"What?" Tubbo blurted.

"I am hereby exiled from L'Manberg, and the Dream SMP, until the fourth of January next year," Dream droned on. "As the owner of this server, I'm handing it over to Tommy until I return."

"What?" Tubbo repeated.

"As the temporary holder of the SMP," Tommy added, grinning widely, "I'll escort Dream into exile and check in with him occasionally to make sure he stays put."

"Wait, wait, wait," Tubbo protested. "I'm-- hold on a second--"

Dream turned to him. "Is there a problem?"

Tubbo shoved down his instinctive fear of the man and stood his ground. "You-- what?"

"Dream burned down George's house," Tommy explained gleefully. "So he's getting exiled."

Tubbo stared at them, torn. On one hand, he was happy that Dream wasn't pressuring him to exile Tommy anymore. On the other hand, what the fuck? The 'evidence' that had been the basis for Dream's decision to exile himself was so obviously fake that even a three-year-old would be able to tell. And Dream had been insisting that Tommy had been guilty five minutes ago-- why the hell did he suddenly change his story?

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