D A M A G E D • HS

19

TW: domestic violence,
quick mentions of death

HARRY P.O.V

Arlo Steele has me completely fucked.

She is ruining me in the most frustrating way possible. She's everywhere. In every thought, every place, every mouth, everywhere! She's fucking everywhere.

I don't know why, but I can't escape her at all. She's become this permanent figure in my life all of a sudden, and I don't know how to take, or deal with it.

She's fucked me up bad. So fucking bad that I'm starting to compare people to her.

At the bonfire party, when I had, I think her name is Jenna, clinging to my side, I couldn't stop myself from comparing her to Arlo.

The way her skin felt wasn't as smooth as Arlo's. The way her hair flowed wasn't as nice and healthy as Arlo's. The way she talked wasn't as addicting as Arlo's. The way she smelt wasn't as sweet and comforting as Arlo's. The way she smiles has nothing on the way Arlo glares into my soul.

I couldn't restrain myself from doing so. It was this second nature thing for me to do. Even the way my body felt around her wasn't the way it felt around Arlo. I didn't get those sparks of electricity, or the warm chills rippling down my spine.

Jenna wasn't Arlo, and for some fucking reason, I didn't like that. For some fucking reason, my mind hated the fact that she wasn't the girl with chocolate doe eyes.

It was as if I was repulsed by Jenna, which should be impossible seeing as Jenna is drop dead hot, but she's just not what I'm attracted to I guess.

I mean for fuck sakes, when I kissed Jenna at the bonfire party it felt like sandpaper compared to the pillows that are Arlo's lips. I felt this burning feeling of acid when my lips met hers, unlike the burn of pure pleasure when mine met Arlo's. The only time kissing Jenna was bearable, was when I was staring at Arlo while kissing her.

When looking at her the world faded into a blur, and for a while I forgot who I was kissing. I began to unconsciously trick myself into thinking that I was kissing Arlo.

Jenna's scratchy lips started to become soft and smooth. Her harsh tongue became silky and sweet. Her kiss started to feel like Arlo and that appeased me.

The placebo effect however could only work so much. Even though kissing Jenna started to feel better, her lips could never compare to the sinfully sweet Arlo Steele.

All of this is aggravating. I don't like Arlo or anything, I still really fucking hate her, but my body craves the fuck out of her.

When I saw her wonder off at the bonfire party, my feet moved before my mind could proccess how stupid it would be to follow Arlo.

I did it anyways, I followed her, I stood and watched her, I sat next to her because of what? Some itch that needed to be scratched? Some craving that needed to be satisfied?

What did I think I was going to get out of it? Hooking up with her again? I know to my dismay that's never going to happen again. I'm aware that I agreed that it was a one time thing when Arlo brought it up after we woke up from our nap, but If I could, I'd fuck the shit out of her a few more times.

Oh god

I want to sleep with her...again

I've always been a one and done type of guy. I sleep with a girl once and that's it, I move on to the next, almost as if that girl never existed.

So why the fuck do I want to sleep with her again? Why am I willing to drop everything in life to have another go with her? Why did sex have to be so addicting with her?