His Cornflower (camilo madrigal x Oc)

10

"thank you for coming!" said abuela leading mariano and his mother out of the house.
"goodbye!" said mariano's mother while they walked off.
"huh, i guess he wasn't going to propose..." whispered dolores seemed a bit confused.
"well maybe he has big plans." said mirabel rubbing her cousin's back.
"yeah maybe he's planning something else." i shrugged receiving a smile from the taller girl.

"well i'm going to sleep." said miguel passing by.
"you always sleep." said dolores crossing her arms.
"well you always whisper and you don't see me complaining." miguel rolled his eyes while scratching his back.
"i wonder which side of the family your brother's from." mirabel joked getting a small laugh from dolores.
"i guess he might be adopted." i shrugged.

"well i suppose we should sleep too." said mirabel.
soon after a while camilo passed by us rushing up the stairs "where are you going?" asked mirabel a big shocked by his figure. camilo quickly shifted into isabela,felix and then to himself before quickly going inside his room.
"i hope he's not feeling lost again..." dolores said holding onto mirabel's hand.

"lost?" i asked looking over at the two.
"well..." mirabel looked over at dolores seeming as if she wasn't sure of to neither talk about the subject or not.
"camilo sometimes feels a bit...nervous about himself." dolores tried to explain, i thought for a bit before understanding. i guess what he told made more sense now.
"yeah..." responded mirabel a bit more quietly.

"let's just go to sleep." i suggested getting a nod from the girls.
i was about to go inside the guest room but something had stopped me, i looked over at camilo's door by the balcony, i was a bit worried about him i suppose. i wasn't sure if anyone had already go up to his room to check on him or not, i had to try and see for myself.
"what are you  doing maria?" asked my dad passing by me while going inside the room.
"i'm going to talk with someone for a little." i said and rushed up the house's staircase and towards camilo's room.

i stood in front of his door not really confident to knock. did something happen? did i make him upset? was he in pain or hurt? maybe dolores is already inside and i might just end up making everything embarrassing in there, or maybe even his mom is inside!
i groaned hitting myself on the forehead to get my confidence back up, i took a deep breath and spent a few moments staring at the door before using my knuckles to hit onto the wooden surface.

i waited anxiously for someone to open the door, soon enough the door was opened and i soon met a very tired looking camilo, his expression quickly changed to a confused one with a bit of shock.
"um...do you need anything?" he asked before clearing his throat shyly.
"well i..." i let my gaze trail around the room before responding "i wanted to check if you were ok...?" i said almost letting it sound like a question, camilo's chest rose up a little as he breathed.
"not...really." he answered shyly while rubbing the back of his neck, so he was upset. i could feel my chest tightening.

we stood in silence for a bit before camilo looked back at me "wanna come inside?" he asked letting his tone of voice come out more quiet and calm.
"sure." i responded and he let me inside his room.
right when i entered i noticed he wasn't in his usual room, this time the room he was in was now a small playground with a pair of swings and a red slide.

"this looks abandoned." i tried joking.
"well maybe it's because of the lack of people." camilo shrugged sitting in front of one of the swings by the grass, leaning his head be able to rest on the surface of the swing.
"so..."i said doing the same.

we sat in silence for a few minutes while watching the trees and hills in front of us a few feet away.
"I don't get it." camilo spoke out of the sudden, i looked over at him.
"what?" i asked.
"myself." he sighed.

"what do you mean by that?" i asked.
"what i mean is..." he trailed off.
"you don't have to tell me everything you know that." i gave him a encouraging smile, he smiled back.
"you know when abuela asked for camilo to wash the dishes?" he said.
"when you were making fun of dolores?" he nodded "what about it?" i asked.

"well that kind of got me off." he shrugged.
"why?" he sat quiet for a while.
"because I don't know who i am anymore." he said fidgeting with his fingers.
"really?" he nodded.

"i just feel like im no one," he sighed "people ask me for an antonio and then they ask for a marcos. god they even tell me they need a dolores sometimes." he hid his face between his hands.
"and now like...i don't even think i can choose who to be." he sighed while leaning his head onto the swing.
"you're camilo." i responded.

"no, camilo is someone else." he said "im nobody." he hid his face again with his hand. i guess by the little sniffs he would let out he was crying.
i sighed and leaned against my head against his shoulder getting his attention.

"hello nobody, i'm maria." i said patting hod head with one of my heads.
"not funny." he said coldly.
"sorry." i bit my lip, i fucked up. "i just never went through something like this. but i'm happy you were able to talk to me about it." i let myself relax against him trying not to get on his bad side.

"thanks." he gave me a small smile.
"how about you do what you want?" i asked.
"i don't know what i want?" he frowned letting his face be visible.
"well do you want to stay here or just get out of the room?" i asked, he thought for a minute.

"i wanna spend time with you." he said quietly.
"well i guess you do know what you want." i smiled.
"alright but what about me? who and what am i?" he looked me in the eyes.
"who do you think?" i asked.
"I don't know." he whispered.

"well you can choose on who to be." i said.
"but what if i want to be marcos?" he smiled.
"then be marcos." i joked, getting a small chuckle from the boy.

"i guess...i'm good with being camilo." he shrugged.
"no." i said "you're good with being yourself." i winked, he laughed.
"this somehow worked." he admitted while leaning his head against mine, i was relieved.

"thank for your help maria, i appreciate it." he sighed.
"it's ok, i'm not the best at helping with this stuff but i'm glad i've made you feel a little bit better." i shrugged.
"well at least i feel better." he smiled.
"you'll get through it, you're a smart guy." i patted his head again.
"and also a dog i suppose?" he joked with a cocked eyebrow, i giggled.