Oh Hell No!

Please Come To My Funeral

Ever had that scary as hell teacher that everyone is afraid of?

Yeah, I do, turns out he's in charge of us (high school part), and I have him for R.V.E (Religious Values Education)

We basically have R.V.E cause our school is a christian school and they make us do it... bleh.

ANYWAY!!! So right now I go back to school in two days (I think) from a two week holiday... I turned my R.V.E assignment in last night... it was due last day of term two weeks ago...

THIS IS HOW I DIE!!!!!

He's going to yell at me, maybe stab me a few times - Probably stab me a few times - Dump my body on the outskirts of town, bury the weapon and any evidence with me, and run.

I am inviting everyone who reads this, to come to my funeral:

It'll be held at Ashton Irwin's house and One Direction will make a song for me and sing it there. Yes, Zayn will come back to the band... FOR ME.

There will be lots of snacks, including: Skittles, more Skittles, even more Skittles, maybe some Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley, some Dylan O'Brien as well...

When I die, I want to give my One Direction Dare To Dream book to... No one. That shit's mine. Everything is mine!! *insert seagulls from Nemo*

ANYWAY!! I please do wish that you will be able to attend and please, someone actually go find my body afterwards. I want a proper funeral thank you very much!

-Emily Irwin

P.s. I officially hate Narnia with a passion.. wtf does it have to do with 'Love In Sacrifice'?! No one careeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssssssss.