A Love Like No Other

Chapter 9

Selene

Xander was in some deep thought. I had already asked him and he did say it was not my fault yet I couldn't help but feel remorse thinking if I did something unknowingly--you never really knew how people perceived your actions, did you? And I didn't like the thought of people feeling down because of me.

I despised the thought of my words or actions hurting anyone. I knew it wasn't up to me because people's reactions to my actions and words were their own and not my responsibility, nevertheless, I wanted to avoid it as much as possible.

"I told you, you haven't done anything," Xander said and this time I jumped, feeling the harshness in his voice. I had never heard him talk that way. All those times where I had expected him to be a monster and see a glimpse of beast some thought he had, it was never there but now that I had seen him as someone like an Angel, he showed me shadows of an unseen monster in his eyes.

Yes, I saw it.

Those eyes, only some time ago, looked as if they were the most beautiful ocean eyes but right now as he gazed at me with a fathomable darker shade, they looked like violent clouds that took away the light by clouding it.

Why?

What happened to him?

A worry settled in my stomach but I, a coward who didn't like losing, didn't have it in her to get deeper into the darkness and chase away his troubles.

Wish I could...

But the panic that was rising in me slowly only knew it was impossible.

Why?

Two things were there.

One; I'd find what troubled him and I wouldn't be able to take them away.

Second; I'd find the kind of secrets that would make me want to run away from him. I enjoyed being with him.

The second one felt deeper in my heart because I didn't want to be away from the protectiveness he radiated. 

Selene was a girl who felt everything too easily. She couldn't decipher her feelings and by the time she did, often, it would be too late.

Too late.

No.

I left his forearm, knowing I needed my space. I finally got a reason to be scared of him. I didn't want everyone to be good to me-it was unrealistic to expect that, yet a heavyweight was placed in my heart due to his tone and the look he gave me.

I looked back at Jasmine and Alex who had fallen asleep.

When I turned to Xander, he looked even scarier with his hard look, not a hint of tenderness anywhere there. I searched for it but it never appeared and neither did my heightened emotions disappeared.

I moved away, watching him grit his jaw.

What had gone wrong at this moment?

"I'm sorry," I said and stood up, throwing the cover that Nate had given me before leaving.

I loved too easily. I fell too easily. I reacted too easily. And I knew this was on me, not on others.

Breathe, Selene. Breathe. It's okay. I repeated over and over again so I wouldn't react right away but... habits took time to die.

I shook Jasmine's body, knowing I couldn't just leave her here without a word with two people I didn't entirely trust. I swallowed the lump in my throat because I already had. Why did I trust him without knowing?

"Jasmine," I whispered, shaking her body, making sure my hair covered my face. "Jasmine," I called her again. Her response was a sleepy moan.

Alex woke up, rubbed his eyes, and looked around with confusion.