Tuesday- the oneshots

substances pt.2

Jade

"Shall we head up to bed bubba?" I whispered, kneeling down beside Perrie. 
"Bed?" She mumbled, already half asleep.
"Yeah. Get up," I said softly. I helped her up and she stumbled up to me, slowly wrapped her arms around my waist and put her nose in my neck, sniffling a little. I noticed how cold her body was now- the drugs had worn off and the high was quickly going down. On top of that, she had been outside wearing near to nothing and was now naked. I lifted her into my arms, with difficulty from her position and inability to help but carried her up the stairs nonetheless. I took her through into my bedroom, prepared to get her in a warm bath but saw Ruby sat up in my bed, with Tinkerbell on the TV. She looked over at me and smiled slightly. I could tell she had been crying and I felt bad. In the haste of Perrie being high and getting home, I'd completely fogotten about the storm and her really. 
"Hi mama," she mumbled, sitting up on her knees. 
"Hi love," I replied. I set Perrie down on the bed and she laid down. Ruby looked over. 
"You need a bath, Pez. A warm one," I mumbled, sitting beside her and moving some hair behind her ear. 
"Hm, no Jade." I sighed.
"Hm, yes Perrie." 
She groaned loudly and shook her head before closing her eyes tightly. 
"I go run the bath mama?" Ruby asked me sweetly. I smiled widely and nodded. 
"Yes please baby, not boiling but warm, yeah?" She nodded and scurried off to the bathroom. 

It took some persuading but I got Perrie in the bath. She didn't want me in there with her though which made me a bit nervous as I had no idea what was going through her mind but she allowed the compromise of keeping the door open.
I sat on the bed with Ruby's head on my thighs and ran my fingers through her hair. I knew she wouldn't sleep with the storm but I knew Perrie needed to sleep soon- well I wanted her to sleep. I could ehar her sighing and moving around in the bath and I wanted to talk to her, get to the bottom of it before it all got too out of hand but I didn't want Ruby to know. If Ruby knew then all hell would break lose and the whole house would know. Which would only turn back to Perrie. Maddie knew but she'd keep it to herself. 

Perrie got herself out of the bath and I could see her sat on the toilet lid, wrapped in a towel, seemingly in her own world. The storm had calmed down and the light rain on the windows actually lulled Ruby to sleep. She was curled at one side of my bed, wrapped in my blanket and holding her teddy tight. I had to turn the main light off and have my lamp on. The TV was also off. I got up, out of bed, grabbed Perrie a pull up and some of my pyjamas before walking into the bathroom and closing the door behind me. She didn't acknowledge me. 

"Do you want to talk now or in the morning?" I asked her, setting the things beside her. 
She sighed, "I don't want to talk at all." 
"I'm afraid I won't give you that option this time," I replied. 
"Why not? It's no different." Attitude was laced in her voice and I knew she was agitated. I just didn't know how to help it. 
"It's very different, Pez. You snuck out of the house at an ungodly hour in the middle of a storm with my money. I think it's quite different." 
She was silent for a moment. "Well, no. It's not."
"Pez, look. We speak about this now, properly, without the attitude or we get into bed and sleep then speak about it in the morning." 
"Why are you being so serious about it, goddamn it," she huffed and turned away from me completely. 
"Becasue I care about you. Every girl in this house cares about you so much more than you see! We want you to be okay baby." 
"I am okay Jade!" She groaned, louder than I wanted her to. "I'm perfectly fucking fine now can you please leave so I can get dressed." She said to me. I sighed and walked towards the door. 
"You're quite obviously not and until you realise that and allow help, I'm not letting you out of this house. Get dressed and come sleep." I shut the bathroom door behind me and got into bed. I wanted to be next to Ruby but I also didn't want to let Perrie out of my sight really. However, I could feel a headache coming on and had to sleep. 

The next morning

Perrie had been avoiding me all morning. I hated it. I could tell she was hurting since she was being snappy with everyone and I've had to tell her on multiple occasions. Gracie was cooking now and I was watching TV with Leigh and Ruby- everyone else was in the house. Perrie had gone to her bedroom, fussing quite a lot. 

"God damn it- leave me the fuck alone!" I heard her scream, suddenly. I looked up and heard Maddie shout back. 
"You're a selfish asshole. I'm trying to help you." 
"I don't need your fucking help. I don't need anyone's help so piss off!" I heard a bang then a scream of pain so I shot up and ran up the stairs. Maddie was holding her nose with blood running down her hand, there was a show by her feet and Perrie's door was slammed shut. 

"Shit, are you okay?" 
"She's a fucking psycho," Maddie mumbled to me through her tears. 
"Head downstairs, come on." I took her arm and headed down the stairs, making sure she didn't fall and hurt herself more. I took her into the kitchen and my very own first aid trained cook took her off my hands. I headed back upstairs to Perrie. 

I pushed open her door apprehensively, hoping not to have a shoe thrown at me also. I heard her before I saw her, sobbing. I shut the door behind me and noticed her sat by her dresser, head in her knees, back heaving with sobs. I sighed and went to sit besides her. I didn't know what she wanted so I simply put my hand on her foot, offering her comfort. She choked out an apology, then another and another until I couldn't take it anymore and grabbed her- holding her close to me. I wanted to be mad, upset and disappointed- she threw a fucking shoe at Maddie but I didn't have it in me. She was hurting. She was in excruciating pain. 

"I can't stop thinking about it all," she cried into my chest, gripping my top, turning her knuckles white. 
"It will get better." I whispered, tucking some hair behind her ear. 
"It won't," she sobbed. 
"It will. It will get better and you'll be okay- you're safe baby. So fucking safe with us." 
"I want to get high." 
"No bubba. That's not safe. That's not keeing you safe." 
"It makes me forget Jade! I'm happy when I'm high," she cried even heavier. It hurt me, knowing she wanted it and was trying to explain but I couldn't let her. Not in a million years. 
"But you're sadder when you're not. I'm protecting you and I need you to pretect yourself. I love you. I don't want you hurt." 
She just cried. A lot. I contiued to hold her until she fell asleep and then stayed on the floor with her. I wanted to take away her pain and they only way I could do that was be there for her until the very end of her pain.