Idalene (gxg)

25

If somebody told me 6 months ago that I would move to another country, I would have called them crazy. I had everything I needed and wanted in the country I grew up in. I had a small family, sure, but I had a lot of great friends who supported me. Everything should've been okay, but there was some type of emptiness inside of me. No, I am not talking about the emptiness I felt when Ida left me, even though I still feel it sometimes – the emptiness I felt 6 months ago was completely different. There comes this one day in your life, when you wake up and realize that you must grow up and it sucks, and you do not want to grow up, it is so much easier to live the life you lived for a long time. I tried ignoring that feeling, but in the end, I suffered mentally and ended up moving to another country. Everything happened rather quick, I applied for the first job I found interesting, and a week later I was signing a job contract. I must say, I am happy everything happened quickly, I did not have time to overthink things – everything happened, and in some way, it felt like it was bound to happen sooner or later. I only told my mom and dad about this change, and they were beyond thrilled. You see, they owned some business in the country I was moving to, and they hoped I could learn a thing or two from that business.

So, I moved to another country six months ago, currently, I have a stable job and whenever I have free time, I help my parents manage their business. I found new friends and spend time with them every other weekend, after the job I usually spend time alone in my apartment. I have taken a break from social media, but I still talk with Bas occasionally, some of my other friends have already visited me, but Bas is planning on doing so in the summer.

Whenever I talk with my mom on the phone, I can hear from her voice that she misses me, don't get me wrong, I miss my parents, but I don't miss my old home. I have bought tickets to visit everyone in two months, but I am dreading it more and more every day.

I also somehow changed my style and started wearing more business casual clothes, which made me feel more grown-up, I guess? I work out 5 days a week at home, I can't be bothered to travel to the gym.

My dating life? Not worth mentioning, I have not been to a single date since moving here.

Of course, there have been some hookups whenever my friends and I went out, but there were no strings attached, which made me realize why people enjoy one-night stands.

There was this one girl I was hooking up with in a bathroom stall with, she tried to choke me gently, but since I found out I liked having the control – I pushed her to the wall and choked her back. The girl, of course, proceeded to choke me harder which resulted in me choking her harder, we did not talk for a few seconds until we started laughing, we then decided to go to the bar and get drunk. And that is the story of how I met my best friend, Valentina.