Its not that bad

24

It's been more than 12 hours. more than 12 fucking hours and my baby isn't out. last time they checked i was only 5 centimeters dilated. I haven't gotten the option for an epidural. But i kinda want to not get one. I don't want to seem like those weird crunchy or earth type moms but i kinda want his birth to be natural.

Timothée doesn't care what way i decide to do it as long as i and our baby are okay. He has been so supportive these past nine months. This pregnancy was harder than i expected and he did all he could to help me. Even when he was thousand of miles away in London he would send me some groceries i needed or some furniture for the nursery.

Timothée refused to eat in the room, He felt bad that i wasn't allowed to eat. Apparently eating food is bad during labor. But i have been getting some apple juice slushees to help with my blood sugar. That all i can have right now. That's why Timothée refuses to eat in the room.

When he's in the room he holds my hand the entire time. Never lets go unless he has to use the restroom or is getting me something. Sometimes he would stand next to me and rub my back. Otherwise he would be holding my hand. He would kiss it from time to time or squeeze it.

"Are you sure you want to do this without an epidural? It's gonna hurt a lot." Pauline asked me. She asked if she could come and watch. She also wanted to take pictures for us. I said yes because i was completely comfortable with her being here. I trust Pauline as much as i trust Timothée, but I love Timothée as a husband and best friend. Pauline is just a friend love.

"Im sure Paul." I say eating my slushee. She nodded and sat back down in her chair. I looked over at Timothée, who laid on the extra bed asleep. I'm happy he is sleeping. I was worried that he was gonna stay up all night watching me. Making sure i'm not dying. He's been super worried ever since we got to the hospital.

"He's gonna be a good dad." Pauline spoke up as she was playing with her finger nails. She bit her lip as she tired to rip a nail off. She looked up at me. "You know a few nights ago he called me. He was having a little anxiety and he was asking me 'What if i'm not prepared' or 'What if he doesn't like me?' and i told him that he'll have to wait. He wasn't supposed to assume that his son won't like him." I smile at Pauline's words.

Timothée has expressed to me a few times asked "What if i'm not a good father?". I bet it's on his mind right now while he's sleep. Well maybe not. He's probably dreaming about something happy because i can see him smiling.

"I think he's gonna be a good father. He's always been good with kids." I say through a smile. He's been so excited for him since he saw the test.

"Yeah, he's never stopped talking about it." Pauline responded. I moved around in discomfort as a major contraction hit. It was bad Pauline stood up and walked over to me. "You okay?" She asked rubbing my back.

I nod a let out a breath. It stopped sooner than i had thought it was. I had the sudden urge to...well. This is a little TMI but i felt like i needed to poop. The doctor told me that if i felt that urge then i was ready to push. "Paul, push the button for me." I ask her. She was confused but pushed it anyways.

"Hello?" A nurse spoke through the com. It was a bit scratchy but not enough to make it sound muffled.

"Hi uhm...This might be a bit awkward but i feel the need to poop and uh the doctor told me that it usually means i'm ready to start pushing." I explain. Pauline's eyes widen.

"Okay, we'll send your doctor over." The nurse kindly says.

"Thank you." I say before the com was cut off. Pauline stays still in shock

"Holy shit i'm gonna be an aunt." She whispers to her self. "I need to sit down." She breaths going over to her chair. I smile at her then look over at Timothée.

"Timothée." I whisper. He stays still. I sigh. "Timothée." I say louder. He jolt up.

"What is it, i'm awake." He speaks with a groggy voice. His hair is crazy right now. I giggle at him. "Is the baby coming?" He asks jumping off the couch.

"I think so." I tell him. He rushes to my side.

"Okay, Do you want me to hold your hand, or your leg? Do you need water? Apple juice?" He panicked. He was hyperventilating a little bit

"Hey, don't panic. He's probably not coming right now." I rub his arm. He put his hand on my back. Timothée took a deep breath. Another contraction hit. I feel something coming out of me.

The doctor came in as soon as it stopped. "Okay, let's see if he's ready." She said snapping her gloves on. I laid back and spreader my legs. She lifted up my gown. "Oh, there he is." She says shocked. "and oh boy he is coming." She stood up.

"Okay Jada, i'm gonna call some more nurses. Do not push. No matter how much you feel like you have to. Do not push." She warned. She rushed out of the room. Pauline walked over.

"Do you want me to leave?" She asked using her thumbs to point to the door. I nod. She walked out. I don't think she wanted to see what was going to happen. My doctor comes back in with a few nurses.

"Okay Jada. when you feel a contraction you can start to push. Now Timothée i'm gonna need you to hold her leg okay?" Timothée nodded. One of his hands lifted up my leg. His eyes almost bulged out of his head.

"That's a lot of hair." I hear him mumble. The doctor chuckles at him.

"I've seen more." She states. A contraction hits me like a bus. Immediately start to push. "Good job Jada, keep on pushing." I hear.

Timothée's pov
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I could never do this. I could never push a baby out of me. I have so much respect for her and other women that do this.

This is going by so fast. The baby is practically out of her. She reaches over to my open hands and grabs it. She squeezes it hard as she pushes again. The doctor takes my baby by his shoulders and pulls him out.

His cries fill the room. Jada let's go of my hand. She was crying more than he was. They placed him on her chest with a towel under him. He squirmed around still crying. I feel the tears burn my eyes then fall.

I place my hand on his head and rub my thumb on it softly. Some nurses wiped the gunk off of him as i looked. "Hello Beau.."